101 Deep Questions to Ask Your Partner, Boyfriend, or Girlfriend
How well do you know your partner? We don't just mean their favorite color or movie, but really know them. Beyond daily habits and favorite things, have you ever asked the deep questions? Or serious questions that truly matter? Their likes, dislikes, trauma, regrets, passions, dreams and greatest desires. RELATED: Do the 36 Questions That Lead to Love Really Work? These are not meant to undermine your relationship. An honest discussion will benefit you in many ways: Build deeper trust and understanding to get through not only the good times, but also the bad ones. It's a fun (even if it can get heavy sometimes) way to strengthen your bond. It allows you to be vulnerable and learn more about yourself. It encourages active and emphatic listening, which tends to reveal a lot about your partner's character and values. Overall, it's a great opportunity to learn more about your partner, their past, and visions for the future. Asking the right question at the right time can help us realize breakthroughs in many important areas of life, from finding out what we want to do with our life to improving personal relationships. How well do you know your partner? Discover Deeper Connection with Your Partner! Uncover the Secrets of Love and Intimacy with this Couples Card Game Communication will bring understanding and understanding will cause harmonious mutual relationships which can establish peace and stability. – Lobsang Tenzin The Power of Deep Questions in Every Relationship RELATED: How Soon Is Too Soon to Move In? The 5 Most Important Questions to Answer Understanding is the gateway to compassion and love, and questions allow us to obtain that necessary level of understanding, helping us learn why our partner behaves or thinks a certain way. Looking for meaningful questions to deepen your relationship? Here are 101 conversation starters to help you and your partner connect on a more intimate level. Couples Should Have Deeper Conversation about Life1. What’s something you’re glad you’ll never have to do again? When it comes to getting to know your partner on a more meaningful level, it really helps to build an understanding of any experiences they’d like to avoid — and why. Knowing the answers to these questions can be stress-relieving, or help to circumvent awkward situations, as well as cultivate empathy and a deeper understanding of their character. 2. What’s one thing you always procrastinate on?3. What would you do with your life if you were suddenly awarded a billion dollars? While winning a billion dollars is highly unlikely, anything is possible. What this question really reveals is more than their dream vacation, or how they would spend almost unlimited wealth. It reveals where your partner’s priorities lie when the usual obstacles and impediments are removed, and what their biggest dreams will be — the ones they’d like to pursue in their heart of hearts. 4. What should a healthy relationship provide for the people in it? Relationship questions like this one are rather crucial to your expectations and theirs, and can be very helpful in determining whether your relationship needs and goals are aligned or not. If they’re not, you may find there is common ground enough to come together anyway — but knowing comes first. 5. Do you believe everything happens for a reason, or do we just find reasons after things happen?6. Is there anything you consider absolutely unforgivable? If your partner has a deal-breaker associated with unforgivable acts, it doesn’t hurt to know what it is so you can be sure that it doesn’t conflict with any of your unforgivable end zones. Plus, if you disagree on what’s forgivable, that’s worth discussing. 7. If you woke up tomorrow with no fear, what would you do first?8. In your life, what has been the biggest blessing in disguise? This is a great way to understand how your partner’s mind works — how they put things in perspective for themselves, and how they process ‘positive’ vs ‘negative’ forces in their lives. 9. If you could pick one year of your life to do-over, which would it be and why? 10. What is one behavior that you never tolerate? Your partner may not tolerate clutter or messiness in their home, or they may not like the idea of having friends over late into the night. It's worth comparing and contrasting which behaviors you find acceptable and which you can’t stand. How else will you know if you’re well-aligned? 11. If you could write a note to your younger self, what would you say in only three words?12. What is the one thing that makes you feel alive? Whether it’s mountain climbing, skydiving, performing in front of an audience, traveling to new places, or simply being creative on a regular basis, it’s worth knowing what gets your partner’s juices flowing. Because arguably, feeling alive is everything! 13. What would your perfect day look like? Not only can this question help you plan the perfect surprise birthday itinerary, but it can teach you a ton about how your partner likes to unwind and have fun — always useful information! 14. Do you usually follow your head or your heart when making decisions? Contrary to surface-level understandings, "heart people" can be highly compatible with "head people," even helping to balance one another out, so don’t worry about their answer being different than yours, or being overly emotional compared to them. Also, don’t get stuck on black-or-white answers, as these things never are. 15. What is something that never ends well? It prompts discussion about experiences or situations that consistently have negative outcomes. It can reveal patterns to avoid, and potentially add some humor about mistakes to avoid. 16. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?Romantic Questions: Thinking about Your Relationship These are not just random questions to ask your boyfriend or partner. In real life, knowing how they want to spend date night, what the most attractive quality they find in others is, or what their favorite romantic movie is can seem like a silly thing to want to know at first. RELATED: 3 Ways to Beat Relationship Boredom However, they are also interesting questions that reveal much about compatibility, and the sort of romantic things and experiences they want in their lives. 1. What did you think when you first met me? If you haven’t discussed your first impressions of one another, there’s really no time like the present. The answer to this question might be amusing; it might also be romantic. One thing's for sure, it’ll give you an insider's view on the path your partner traveled to choosing you. 2. What about our relationship makes you really happy? Best case scenario: you gain a deeper understanding of what your partner appreciates about you, which can serve as a wonderful anchor in your relationship. Not to mention, regularly communicating what you appreciate about one another is the stuff of strong relationships. 3. If you had one word to describe our relationship what would it be?4. What’s your biggest fear for this relationship? Relationship anxiety is extraordinarily common, but there’s no antidote to this particular brand of fear like talking it through with an empathetic partner. Relationship fear is often based on past experiences, and once they’re out in the open, they have a greater chance of dissipating. 5. What’s one difference between us that you absolutely love? They say opposites attract, and while this is certainly not always the case, having palpable differences is often a source of interest, intrigue and attraction between partners. Why not get some positive feedback on being yourself? 6. What’s one similarity between us that you absolutely love?7. What about me (outside of a physical feature) made you fall in love? If you’re in love, and the feeling is mutual, this is a question that can only feed your mutual affection and appreciation for one another — so don’t be afraid to ask. 8. What’s your favorite memory of us? It's a reflective question that opens up emotional connection and at the same time helps you understand what your partner values most about your relationship. 9. What’s one thing you want to do together that we’ve never done before? This question is perfectly suited to laying sprawled out in a field of flowers, visioning for the long-term with your significant other. It’s really healthy to want to share certain experiences (be it singing a duet at an open mic, entering a marathon, or buying real estate). And it’s even healthier to express it! 10. Where is your favorite place to be with me?11. What’s one thing you’re scared to ask me, but really want to know the answer to? These types of boyfriend questions are important: If your partner actually has an answer to this one, chances are you’ll want to ask the question. Better to get everything out in the open sooner than later. It may end up being an opportunity to hear the hardest truth, but one that strengthens the relationship over the long term. 12. What’s one thing you feel our relationship is lacking? It's a constructive but honest question. Feel free to ask it only when you are both ready for feedback so you can identify unmet needs or areas for growth. 13. What’s your favorite non-physical quality about me? Attraction is often based at least in part on physical traits, particularly at the beginning of a relationship. But if your relationship is a strong one, there is surely more to your bond than looks. Hearing all the other things that fuel your partner’s attraction can be really refreshing, enlightening, even. 14. If our relationship ended, what’s the one thing about it you’d miss the most?15. What do you think was your most vulnerable moment in our relationship? Staying honest (and therefore vulnerable) is integral to any successful relationship. What better way to achieve this than to talk about moments of authentic vulnerability without judgment? 16. What’s one secret you’ve wanted to tell me, but haven’t?17. What’s your favorite way to receive affection? Different people have different love languages, from physical touch, to words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time, and acts of service. There’s no better way to give and receive affection than by speaking each other’s language. 18. What’s one thing you think makes our relationship unique from everyone else’s?19. If you could change one thing about our relationship what would it be? It might seem counterintuitive to invite conversation based on the assumption that your partner would, in fact, change something about your relationship, but sometimes, it’s questions like these that make someone feel comfortable enough to raise an issue that's been on their mind. 20. What do you think is your biggest strength in this relationship?21. What’s one thing about your life you would never change for someone else, including me? While the tone of this question may seem a tad negative at first glance, identifying your partner’s non-negotiable traits, habits or attachments can go a long way toward helping you understand what’s most important to them in life. 22. What about us do you think works well together? How do we balance each other out?23. What does love mean to you?24. What do I mean to you? This question is makes both parties vulnerable, so it's natural to want to shy away from it. But at a certain point in your relationship (you’ll know what point — it’s different for everyone), hot and heavy questions like this one are fair — and, hell, they can be extremely romantic too. 25. What was your first impression of me?26. What’s the most romantic movie you’ve ever seen?27. Do you believe in love at first sight?Fun Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend, Boyfriend or Partner Not everything has to be so serious! Sometimes the best relationship advice is to be silly and enjoy cute questions about crazy things. RELATED: The 60 Best Secret Crush Quotes to Help You Thirst in Style Funny questions can sometimes lead to a really good conversation that you guys will be really glad you had. 1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?3. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose? Although questions like these have a bit of a party-trick vibe, they can also be very revealing of your partner’s core values. What does your partner value more: looks or lucidity? While answers should be taken with a grain of salt, you can learn lots from the inevitable explanations that accompany such answers. 4. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? (If their sense of humor is dark like yours)5. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be? Many of us fantasize about possessing certain "superpowers" or abilities. This is a fun question to ask, but it can also teach you lots about your partner’s deepest wishes (be it to fly above it all, turn invisible on whim, or set fire to things spontaneously) — so ask, ask away! 6. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?7. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? In the spirit of bringing the best out of one another, this question can help you plan a future in which you do just that. Why not encourage your partner to follow their dreams and talk through it with them if they get stuck? 8. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?9. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life. Think of your most embarrassing moments as a treasure trove of a) good stories, b) hard lessons learned, and c) personal growth signposts. Sharing these with your partner will very likely bring you closer. After all, any partner worth their salt wants to know the real you — not the airbrushed version. 10. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?11. What’s your favorite karaoke song?12. What is your go-to Halloween costume?13. Who is your big celebrity crush?Questions to Ask Your Partner about the Future1. Where do you see yourself in five years? If your partner hasn’t given any thought to this question, and you have (or vice versa), a discussion wouldn’t hurt. Sometimes all it takes is a little communication for two people to start creating five-year plans together. 2. How do you see our future together? Where do you see it headed? It may seem daunting, but it’s important to have ‘the talk’ with your best friend and potential lifelong mate. If your hearts and paths are aligned, there shouldn’t be much in the way of surprises. If they're not, it’s still definitely worth knowing so you can reassess. 3. What are your goals in the relationship?4. What are your thoughts on having a family? This is not a peripheral question: if you want a big family but your partner would rather limit your dependents to cats and dogs, you need to have a discussion to determine whether there’s enough flexibility to move forward. 5. Where do you see yourself living when you retire?6. What are your financial priorities and goals? Money and love may seem antithetical, but the strongest relationships are transparent on all fronts. In other words, if you couldn’t care less about money or saving for the future, but your partner is steeped in mutual funds and RRSPs (or vice versa), it may be worth talking about to avoid future conflicts or imbalances in the relationship. 7. What is on your bucket list that we can do together this year?8. What’s the one thing you want to achieve the most before you die? If your partner has a goal to end all goals — something they don’t want to leave this earth without achieving (i.e. writing a novel, or opening a café) — you may want to consider getting behind it and supporting them. Because happier people make better partners! 9. Do you have any habits you want to change? Be it quitting smoking and drinking, or curbing a bad temper, knowing your partner’s personal betterment aspirations can help you be a stronger support when they need it the most. 10. What do you most look forward to about getting old? ‘Getting old’ might not be a topic either of you naturally turn to, but talking about it can really help clarify your respective life trajectories (or at least the ones you see yourself following), as well as how your partner imagines life with you in the (distant) future. 11. What are you hoping to learn in the coming year?12. What’s the best advice you’ve ever received in your whole life? It reveals your partner's life wisdom and values, formative influences, or mentor relationships. 13. If you could see into the future, what’s one thing you want to see? Many of us would rather not look into the future and find out things that might rob us of quality of life in the present moment. Then again, your partner may have good reasons to prefer knowing how certain life aspects will unfold. You should probably hear this. 14. How do you want to be remembered?Questions to Ask Your Husband, Wife or Partner about Their Past1. When’s the last time you felt vulnerable? How did you cope?2. What have you accomplished in the past year that you are most proud of? Close as you feel to your partner, you may not actually be aware of how they judge their own achievements and what it is they take real pride in. True intimacy requires learning more about your partner’s inner world when the opportunity presents itself. 3. What were the major turning points in your life? From past trauma dating back to one's childhood, to struggles with anxiety, depression, or addiction your partner may have dealt with before knowing you, ‘turning points’ come in many forms. Learning your partner means knowing their history. 4. When’s the last time you pushed out of your comfort zone? How did it make you feel?5. What is your happiest memory? Sharing the happiest memories of our lives is a beautiful way of getting closer to our partners while opening the door to creating new happy memories together as a couple. 6. How have you changed in the past five years?7. When was the last time you cried and why? Some people cry often, and others rarely. We all have different relationships to shedding tears, and understanding your partner’s will only shed light on their emotional reality. Bonus: asking the question entails sharing a vulnerable moment, and vulnerability breeds intimacy. 8. What is an important life lesson you’ve learned?9. What’s the most daring thing you’ve ever done? We don’t all have the same notions of courage, or of boldness. You can learn volumes about your partner by hearing them tell of the most daring thing they ever did, and the kind of results it manifested in their life. 10. What is the biggest lesson you’ve learned from past partners? Not everyone likes to discuss their previous relationships with their current partner, and indeed, there should be a limit to such discussions. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t valuable lessons to be shared. Chances are that learning about your partner’s experiences in previous serious relationships will help you to better understand their behaviors today. 11. What’s the most challenging setback you’ve ever experienced? How did you overcome it?12. If you could change one thing in history, what would it be?13. What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?14. If you had to listen to just one of the songs you loved as a kid for the rest of your life, which song would it be?15. Did you have any pets growing up? Particularly if animals are important to you, and/or you plan on having pets in the future, it’s integral you get to know your partner’s attitude toward animals. 16. What is your favorite childhood memory?Heavy Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend, Boyfriend or Partner1. Do you want to have kids? If so, how many?2. When you’re having a bad day, what makes you feel better? This is the kind of question that helps you better understand how to comfort your girlfriend when she's down and just needs a reprieve from life for a minute (or a day). Whether it’s cooking a meal, cleaning the apartment, or giving her a temple massage, these are important life skills, so never underestimate them! 3. Do you consider yourself a jealous person?4. Have you ever cheated on a partner? If your girlfriend has cheated in the past, it’s worth knowing, just as it's worth knowing what led her to it, and how she feels about it in retrospect. People grow and change — they do it all the time. 5. Why did your last relationship end?6. How important is religion or spirituality in your life? Religion and/or spirituality may or may not play a significant role in your life — either way, unless the topic was at the forefront of your first meeting, your partner might have an altogether different relationship to faith. If you want to build a future together, don’t hesitate to ask her. If she’s worth being in a relationship with, she’s worth really knowing. 7. Who was your role model growing up?8. Have you ever been in an emotional or physically abusive relationship? If your partner has coped with an abuser in the past (be it an ex-partner, a parent, or anyone else) getting closer to your girlfriend likely means learning what she’s been through — to whatever extent she’s willing to share. 9. How important are looks to you?10. Do you think a relationship can come back from cheating? In a committed, monogamous relationship, no one wants a partner who strays. That said, your boyfriend might take cheating less seriously than you do — or vice versa. Put your mind at ease by addressing concerns as they arise, and with total transparency. 11. How long was your longest relationship?12. How do you see our future together: do you envision a two-income household, or a different arrangement? Whether you envision yourself as a blissfully content stay-at-home-mom, a high octane corporate executive — or both — finding out what kind of household arrangement your boyfriend imagines for his future (i.e., blissfully content stay-at-home dad) can help circumvent a lot of potential conflict in the future. 13. Have you ever struggled with addiction? While it’s true that our struggles do not define us, your boyfriend’s history with any sort of addiction is something you’re within your rights to ask about, as it may affect you too. Even if this does not represent his current reality, understanding his past struggles can help you become a lot better acquainted with the man you’re sharing your life with. 14. Have you ever been engaged or married? Becoming acquainted with the broad strokes of your boyfriend’s past romantic life can help you better understand his behaviors, interests, and hesitations in your current relationship. 15. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? You might have a very different style of communicating or relating to others than your boyfriend does. This doesn’t make you incompatible—in fact, it might even make you extra complementary. Still, it helps to address these differences so you can better understand and empathize with one another, while also being supportive of your partner even if you can’t directly relate to their difficulties. Why Are Questions in Relationships So Important? Ultimately, when it comes to building and maintaining strong relationships, communication is both king and queen! The more deeply you open up to truly getting to know one another, the sturdier your foundation will be. Nothing can shake you if your version of intimacy includes sharing your best and worst moments with compassion, acceptance, and love. Asking questions (and answering them) without reservation is a surefire way to open up the floodgates of vulnerability—by extension cultivating deeper shared emotional experiences. With additions by MJ Kelly and Maya Khamala KEEP READING: Are You in Love? These 5 Proven Signs Will Help You Know for Sure
What to Do When You're in a Toxic Relationship (Even if You Can’t Get Out)
A toxic relationship can seem impossible to escape.Like a leech that has latched onto you, it refuses to let go. That is, until it has reminded you how worthless you are, and drained you of all energy.Throughout my life, there has been more than one occasion where I found myself trapped under the same roof, or in the same workplace, of toxic associations. So, I can attest to their power and influence.RELATED: Toxic People and How to Deal With ThemNegative associations can embed themselves so deeply into our lives that they may seem impossible to escape. But there is a way, even if you can’t distance yourself from the person now, by re-balancing the mind and shifting the dynamic.Every bad association offers a different dynamic, but this is how I’ve done it. I hope it can be of use to you.Toxic relationships come in all shapes and sizes, from the family member who seems to have taken issue with our basic existence, to the colleague who targets us for belittlement, to the spouse who's revealed to be someone other than we thought. How to Rise Up in a Toxic RelationshipPhoto by RODNAE Productions from PexelsThe issue with bad associations is that sometimes we’re placed (or end up) in a situation where we can’t get out. Whether it’s at work, at home, or in a social circle filled with friends we could never imagine abandoning, sometimes the most common advice for toxic relationships won't work. Leave them, get out -- you get the idea.We teach people how to treat us.DR. PHILThere are different ways to approach the situation. However, I’m a firm believer that whether or not it's someone else’s fault, we rarely get anywhere by harping on what we think has been done to us. If you reflect on what they’re doing to you, and how much you despise them for it, you’re only going to bring yourself down further.What you need to do is... rise up. It’s about doing everything you can to better yourself, rather than fantasizing about changing someone else. That's because, in most cases, you're only wasting your time. There are three main steps to doing that in a toxic relationship:1. Re-balancePhoto by JÉSHOOTS from PexelsIf you strip down the issue to its essence, negative associations are what “information” you’re absorbing through your senses, how long it remains, how deeply it's embedded, and whether it’s challenged by another belief.However, this information doesn’t just come from our interactions with other physical people, it also comes from media such as books, movies, TV, podcasts, and so on. Negative associations have a way of “tipping the scales” of our state of being. They take the life out of us because they get into our head and change our self-talk to something demoralizing. (For most of us, our self-talk isn’t very healthy to begin with.) So, if you tip the scales right back with positive media and associations, you can begin to negate the very effect they’ve been having on you.You’ll need to be relentless. Around negative associations a lot at work or home? Wear your headphones, and listen to podcasts, audio books and music that make you feel empowered. Mix it up. Keep yourself busy learning, doing, and moving yourself forward.RELATED: The Life Cleanse: 6 Steps of Letting Go of a Toxic RelationshipThis is a great opportunity to start learning something new, or for taking action on something you’ve wanted to do but have previously lacked the confidence. Buy some audio books and listen to them constantly. Get excited about learning something new. However this works best for you, the idea is that you want to inject yourself with empowering and motivational information.Try to keep the information beneficial for personal growth in general, and not merely for base motivation, though. You want to make sure you’re using the time to move your life forward and not to simply jack yourself up with no intention in mind.2. Shift the Dynamic to Change the RelationshipPhoto by Anna Shvets from PexelsThe reality is, how we're treated is not entirely the responsibility of other people. In any relationship, there’s a dynamic that’s established from the very moment you meet. We teach others how to treat us by dictating this dynamic, or allowing them to do so, to varying degrees.So, while you may not be able to get away from every bad association, you can change the dynamic to change the relationship. Rise above, and let your new, more confident self take control of that dynamic, and change it in your favor.RELATED: These 6 Types of Relationships Will Drain Your EnergyDogs often enjoy messing with cats, particularly the first time they meet. That is, unless the cat has the confidence to retaliate. When I was younger, a cat once sneaked into our backyard one summer afternoon while I was shooting baskets. My old Golden Retriever, Charlie, noticed him jump the gate from across the yard. The thing is, dogs will try to play with a cat, purely for their own enjoyment, until the cat pulls out its claws. That’s exactly what happened. All it took was one swipe, and Charlie ran, yelping, into the house. He kept his distance from cats after that. Often, all it takes is a stinging clap back at the other person to change the dynamic, permanently.To be clear, I’m not advising anyone to insult or abuse someone. It's simply a matter of practicing standing up to the other person, verbally, with the new confidence you’ve developed. Don’t give them an inch. Obviously, this is easier said than done. However, if you consistently place yourself into a more confident state of mind, this becomes easier and more natural. That's why that was step one.3. Be Consistent About GrowthPhoto by Dominika Roseclay from PexelsAll that’s left to do now is to commit to consistent growth.When someone sees that you’re trying to move forward and do something with your life, and that you're not seeking their permission to so, they often take note.In this way, they’ve developed a kind of respect for you -- as terrible of a person as they might be -- because you're standing up to them and not letting them hold you back. It’s about becoming this immovable beacon of light. Because of this respect, they no longer act the same around you.It’s impossible to force anyone to change. However, with this process, you can not only give yourself the best chance at bringing out a better side of someone (or, at least, demanding respect), you’ve bettered yourself and not allowed their negative influence hold you back.KEEP READING: 4 Warning Signs That Your Work Culture Is Toxic
Feeling the Winter Darkness? These Dawn Simulators Will Help Boost Your Energy
Feeling in a slump? A dawn simulator, which uses lights to imitate the sun's rising at dawn, can help boost your energy. Dawn simulators let you program lights that progressively increase in intensity to wake you up in the morning. They are easy to use, as you just set them up like an alarm clock and allow the light to reach your retina while you’re still sleeping.Using a dawn simulator offers a few key benefits. It can support a healthy circadian rhythm and even help balance hormones and positively influence cortisol levels (the stress hormone). Dawn simulators can be used to treat seasonal affective disorder, depending on the light intensity. There are also sleep benefits. It may seem backward to use a wake-up lamp to help you sleep better, but light can control our melatonin levels and consequently, affect our quality of sleep. Changing your light exposure can help regulate your melatonin levels and improve energy levels throughout the day. Before purchasing a dawn simulator, there are a few things to consider. According to findings, 10,000 lux is the ideal amount of light intensity for SAD treatments, but lower lux levels are still effective for everyday use. Other than budget considerations, you also need to keep in mind the distance that your light is going to have to be to work efficiently. Most good-quality dawn simulators will allow the treatment to be effective from at least 12 inches from your face.How we chose the best dawn simulators To choose the best dawn simulators, we took into consideration a few basic criteria:Lux (lx): Most importantly, you’ll want to take note of the lux, or light intensity, of the lamp. The higher the lux, the stronger the concentration of light. Look for a lamp with a lux of 10,000 if possible if you’re looking to treat Seasonal Affective Disorder. If not, just 250-300 lux is fine for basic dawn simulation.What additional features does it offer?Is there manufacturer support / a warranty offered?Does it filter UV rays?Price (Also what is its energy cost?)Ready to find the perfect dawn simulator for your needs? To make your life easier, here are the best options on the market. Philips SmartSleep Wake-up LightThe Philips SmartSleep Wake-up Light, Colored Sunrise and Sunset Simulation works at 300 lux. It also offers 20 different light intensities to help personalize your experience. It doubles as an alarm clock and radio, giving you additional features to look forward to. It does include a warranty of 24 months beginning on the date of purchase for products bought in Canada or the U.S. In terms of price, this dawn simulator would be considered mid-range at $79.95. Pros: Affordable, ability to customize your experienceCons: No nighttime features availableSEE IT: $139.98 at Amazon.com Lumie Bodyclock RiseThe Lumie Bodyclock Rise is around 350 lumens and features wake-up as well as sleep functions. Wake-up includes 30 minutes of sunrise duration, adjustable light intensity, mixed LEDs to simulate the sun accurately, as well as the option for a traditional alarm with tap-snooze. Sleep features include a 30-minute sunset option to help you wind down, as well as a light-sensitive display to adjust to the light in your room. Plus, this dawn simulator also doubles as a nightlight! It has a three-year warranty to cover any issues with the LED lights. The 99$ price tag may seem steep, but it does provide lots of value for its price. Pros: Longer warranty, nighttime functions, good light intensity and high quality LEDsCons: Slightly more expensive, batteries are not includedSEE IT: $99.00 at Amazon.com Philips SmartSleep Connected Sleep and Wake-Up LightThe Philips SmartSleep Connected Sleep and Wake-Up Light has 25 brightness settings and a light intensity of 315 lux. This product’s unique features and functions reflect its $169 price. the price. Smart features include a midnight light, FM radio, phone charging dock, speaker, auxiliary connection, auto-dimming display, smart snooze, and an AmbiTrack sensor that measures your bedroom sleep environment. You can also download the SleepMapper app to track your sleep and get insights and metrics. There’s a full two-year warranty should there be anything wrong with the way your product is manufactured. Pros: Allows you to track your sleep, many additional functions that make it multi-use, great light intensity.Cons: ExpensiveSEE IT: $199.99 at Amazon.com Hatch RestoreThe Hatch Restore is a good dawn simulator with sound and light options to help you customize your sleep and wakeups. The purchase of this light lamp comes with a 30-day free trial of the Hatch Sleep Membership that includes meditations, sleep stories, and more through the content library. This sunrise alarm clock also features a sleep routine function and reading light. All of this can be accessed through the app or by touch. The digital time display doubles as a clock. This product retails for $129.99 and includes a 60-night money back guarantee. Pros: Includes a sleep routine function on top of the wakeup. You can control the settings through your app.Cons: You have to pay for the Hatch Sleep Membership after 30 days to access their content, expensive, does not specify the light intensity (lux), batteries not included.SEE IT: $129.99 at Amazon.com Sunrise Alarm Clock This sunrise alarm clock is very affordable and offers a lot of value for $39.95. First, you get great light intensity at 500 lux. You also get both sunrise simulation and a soft night light. The daytime and nighttime functions include seven respective wakeup or sleep sounds at 10 adjustable volumes. The 20 brightness settings help you customize your sunlight. This dawn simulator also includes eight color lights to mimic a sunrise and three white lights (2500k, 3000k, and 3500k). The correlated color temperature sits at 5200K/1700K. Pros: Great light intensity, nighttime routine functions and adjustable settings, and very affordableCons: No warranty information listedSEE IT: $39.95 at Amazon.com Onlycare Sunrise Alarm Clock Onlycare’s sunrise alarm clock gives you the ultimate bang for your buck. It features a 320 lux brightness and sunrise time of 10-60 minutes. Other features include a sunset simulation, snooze button, dual alarms, FM radio and eight natural sounds mimicking animals, forests and even the ocean to help you sleep. It’s also only $45.99. Pros: Affordable, sunset simulation, batteries included, additional sleep helpCons: No warranty information listedSEE IT: $45.99 at Amazon.com Dawn Simulator FAQsWhat is the difference between a dawn simulator and a SAD lamp? A dawn simulator works similarly to bright light therapy in terms of treating Seasonal Affective Disorder. Although, bright light therapy has a high level of lux needed, which can be more difficult to find in a dawn simulator. A SAD lamp also requires you to be awake during the treatment, whereas a dawn simulator works while you’re asleep. Is buying a higher-end dawn simulator worth it? It depends on the functions of that dawn simulator. If the light intensity fits your needs and includes additional features that are important to you, don’t let the price steer you away from the product. A higher priced dawn simulator doesn’t necessarily mean it’s better though. How long does it take to see benefits from using a dawn simulator? Consistency is key: It could take about a week or sometimes a little more to see results, especially if you’re using it to benefit your mental health or your hormone/cortisol levels. You may notice improved sleep more rapidly.
Twin Flame Meaning: The Signs You've Found Your Spiritual Mirror
with additions by MJ Kelly, Flavia Medrut and Ricky DeriszHave you ever met someone for the first time and felt instantly drawn to them, as if you've known this person before? Did you click right off the bat and immediately establish a deep soul connection? Have you been seeing the number 11:11 sequence at every turn?If the answer to these questions is yes, then you may be experiencing a twin flame connection. The mysterious, cosmic, and much-desired authentic twin flame relationship is said to be life-changing, soul-elevating, and… extremely challenging. Because of this, it's not hard to see why twin flames meet and fall for one another quickly. RELATED: 4 Ways to Tell Someone Might Be Your Soulmate in the First 5 Minutes of Meeting ThemIn this article, we’ll explore the concept of a twin flame, the signs you’ve found your twin flame, and offer some practical guidance to make this esoteric concept a gateway to developing a thriving relationship, based on mutual growth.What Is a Twin Flame?For a concept as artistic as the true twin flame, what better place to begin than Greek philosophy? In Plato’s Symposium, whilst explaining the origin of love, Aristophanes says:“According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.”What’s most telling about Plato’s reflection is that this definition applies to twin flames, more than the traditional definition of soul mate relationships. Although one person can have many soul mates, there is said to be only one twin flame — the other half of the same soul. Plato adds:“...and when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself, whether he be a lover of youth or a lover of another sort, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy and one will not be out of the other's sight, as I may say, even for a moment...”Twin flame connections are on a soul level; they're a relationship of amazement, friendship, intimacy, and intense emotions. But deeper than that, a twin flame is the other half of a soul split in two. One soul, incarnate in two separate beings. As you can imagine, it’s a pretty intense and pretty rare form of romantic relationship; it's more likely to come across a false twin flame than a true twin flame.The Purpose of Twin Flame RelationshipsSimply put, if you find your twin flame, you find your mirror. It is said that once you reach a certain level of consciousness in life and you meet your twin flame, it will catalyze your growth for a divine purpose. This means that there are two of you wandering planet Earth. The other “you” is your twin flame and when you cross paths, you immediately feel as if you’re whole again.But it’s not all sunshine and rainbows, but harsh reflections and shadow work. As your mirror, your twin flame reflects your weaknesses, and areas of growth, as well as your greatest strengths. Essentially, their presence as a romantic partner ignites a spell of intense and rapid personal growth and transformation.RELATED: 20 Soulmate Quotes That Prove the Power of True LoveThe twin flame meaning is fully understood after entering the doors of spiritual awakening and starting the practice of self-inquiry. This is where relationships and personal (and spiritual) growth collide. It is a place where all of you exists, unmasked and exposed, and it craves connection like a caterpillar seeking out the perfect branch to build a cocoon.But this caterpillar doesn’t hope to hide from the exposure. It’s designed to shed its skin — and everything inessential with it — to become something new. Something without the trappings of distortion, lies, misconception, ego, and ignorance that can fly more freely and peacefully.Spotting Twin Flame Signs in Your RelationshipThe biggest twin flame signs in a relationship are unspeakable magnetism, familiarity, and mirroring. Other common twin flame signs include:Meeting this person at a stage of profound personal development.A number of shared synchronicities between the pair of you.A shared desire for spiritual growth and personal development.A sense of timelessness or altered states when you’re together.A strong psychic connection — the ability to read each other.Seeing your twin flame appear in dreams or during meditation.The relationship is intense, with cycles of highs and lows.You can’t escape your own shadow or areas that require self-awareness.RELATED: The Value Of Introspection For Personal And Spiritual GrowthIn addition, it is said there are distinct stages in any twin flame relationship, which are:Yearning for the One: This is a period of perceived lack, with an intuitive knowing someone is out there who will help you feel whole.Meeting the One: Finally, you meet, sparks fly, and your world turns upside down.Falling in love: The inevitable rapid and unavoidable intoxication leads to a romantic wonderland, where all is bliss, and your twin flame can do no wrong.The honeymoon period: This spell might be followed by relative ease. The gift of mutual connection and ways you complement each other take center stage.The testing period: Then issues surface, related to core wounds or trauma. Suddenly, you’re on testing ground, and your twin flame is reflecting the deepest parts of you that have to be seen to be transformed.The runner and chaser: Due to the level of work involved, it’s common for one of the pair to walk away from the relationship, sparking a period of running and chasing, push and pull.The surrender: This is the point where both twin flames accept the divine destiny of the relationship. Both have grown and surrendered to the path laid out before them.Homecoming: Through this process and the integration of shadow elements and healing from trauma, an even deeper level of connection is created, without the turbulence. However, due to the intensity, not all relationships make it to this stage.With this in mind, you may ask yourself, "Are twin flames meant for everyone?" The answer is certainly not. Conventional romance, harmony, or life-long companionship, can all be nurtured with a life partner, or soul mate. If this is the relationship for you, it doesn’t make it any less valuable than the twin flame journey.Relationships can offer incredible, radical personal growth as powerful as any spiritual practice. And there’s no better example of this than in a twin flame relationship. A twin flame relationship is when two people are perfect matches as a result of shared pain or another difficulty. The important part is in the dynamic between the two people, though, and it’s where the difference between a twin flame and a life partner (or soul mate) really exists.3 Subtle Differences Between a Twin Flame and a Life Partner“What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life? They are there to strengthen each other and to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories.” – George Eliot1. A twin flame relationship isn’t about love – life partners are based on itA life partner is someone you have true love for. You know you’ve found your life partner when you’ve identified a real, unconditional love for another and they have expressed (and showed) it towards you. It’s all about love.But a twin flame isn’t about love — it’s about truth. Twin flames can often cause radical personal awakenings for one another because they can see straight through to one another.They’re a perfect match, most specifically with regards to the internal challenges they face, so meeting one another head-on is like being able to face yourself and work through your internal issues.RELATED: 5 Signs That Fear of Being Alone Is The Only Thing Keeping You In A RelationshipAccording to Dr. Lisa Vallejos:“The real purpose of Twin Flame is not about great sex, emotional highs, and an epic love story — it’s to wake you up, shake you up, and call you higher. It is a gift presented by the Divine — one you can only grasp fully when you’ve released all the smaller things you’ve been clinging to for so long that no longer serve you.”In this way, while a life partner is about cultivating a deep connection through love, a twin flame is about cultivating a deep connection through shared pain, understanding, and the growth that comes from that. It’s really about cutting away the layers of noise to get to the truth of your life and all things as a whole.For that reason…2. Your twin flame is supposed to cause you pain – a life partner isn’t (but probably will)Relationships are tough. That’s just the way it is. Even two people who are made for one another, life partners through-and-through, often cause each other quite a bit of pain along the journey of their relationship. It’s inevitable when two people seek to come together in such an intimate fashion that conflict would arise.However, a twin flame is, to some degree, supposed to cause us pain. Without any pain inflicted, we’re probably not going through any real transformation.RELATED: If Your Partner Can’t Say These 7 Things, They Are Probably Not Your SoulmateIt’s in the very definition of intense personal growth that one must experience great pain to realize a great transformation. The pain experienced in a typical relationship with a life partner can and often does help us grow, but it’s more about learning to work together and live with one another.Whereas with the twin flame, it’s about unearthing dirt from one another so that it can be cleansed — but it hurts like hell to raise that dirt before the cleansing.3. A life partner is someone you want to spend your life with, a twin flame is someone you want to get away fromBut that’s not to say you have to follow the desire to flee, which is often the ego’s way of avoiding its own surrender into personal growth. Returning to the twin flame stages, it is possible to reach a level of mutual harmony and calm after the work has been done. But being unable to reach this stage is common — the destiny for some twin flame relationships is for a special moment in time, not necessarily a lifetime.In conclusionTwin flame relationships are rare. It pays to be open-minded, to be self-aware, and to always strive to create meaningful bonds. Relationships can be healthy or unhealthy, regardless of how they’re written in the stars. Although some twin flame signs mirror codependent behavior, its intention is for both people to be free, independent, and self-sustaining — whilst choosing, not needing, each other.The source of a twin flame relationship is a mystery, like one of life’s great existential unknowns. Rather than becoming attached to the story behind the mirror soul, identifying the twin flame signs, and exploring how this relationship can be utilized for mutual growth, is what matters.RELATED: 5 Questions to Ask If You Want to Know If Your Partner Is Your SoulmateWhether approached from the cosmic perspective or the humbling and imperfect attempts to make things work with another human, there’s inspiration to be found in a meaningful narrative. Research The Gottman Institute, a clinical center for relationship health, discovered that relationships most likely to last a long period of time are those that focus on creating something of shared meaning.Ultimately, if the twin flame definition allows for a shared vision, one leading to longevity and growth, that alone is worth its status as something worth exploring.KEEP READING:Your Soulmate Will Destroy ‘You’ – Here’s Why
