3 Secrets to Persevering (When All You Want to Do Is Give Up)
I’m kind of obsessed with studying successful people. I love to know what drives them, how they achieved their level of prosperity, and what makes them stand out from the rest of the pack. I always wondered, "What is their secret?". 3 Secrets to Persevering (When All You Want to Do Is Give Up) Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success. -- Napoleon Hill When I started my business 12 months ago and began to branch out into the wide world of entrepreneurship, I had so much enthusiasm I couldn’t wait to get out of bed each morning. That initial excitement lasted for about three months. Then I got tired. Bills started to come in, and the steady flow of clients and accounts seemed to have stopped. The truth is, there is only so far 'motivation' can carry you and your vision when you are in the grind (especially in the early days). People watch you from afar, some half-expecting you to fail, and after all the good wishes and pep talks, you are only left with yourself -- and your willingness to keep going. The ‘secret’ of the ‘successful’ ones became clear when I was ready to call it quits. READ: With Grace and Grit: A Guide to Sticking it Out for Entrepreneurs When I was in hustle mode but couldn’t see the results I wanted to achieve, I realized what this journey was all about. It wasn’t talent, money or being in the ‘right place’ that made my role models thrive. It was staying in the game. Persistence. Striving. Getting back up. So, I learned – through trial and error -- three keys to keep persevering with my goals, even when I wanted to throw in the towel. Your dreams, goals and vision are your responsibility – your load to carry, so you need to discover (and implement) strategies that will keep you moving forward on your journey: 1. Rest when you need to (but don’t quit) When I find myself getting tired, resentful and just not looking forward to doing things anymore, it’s a sign to rest – not to quit. The Dalai Lama famously said, "When I am busy, I meditate an hour a day. When I am really busy, I double it." Sleep, rest and meditation aren’t something you do as an add-on to each day. Once you make it part of your regular routine, you’ll find your energy expands. When you start feeling and thinking ‘It’s not worth it,’ that’s your body and mind telling you to put on the brakes. Imagine going on a roadtrip without any rest stops. You’ll either burn your engine out or be incredibly miserable when you do get to your destination. Park your car. Fill yourself up. Take a breather. Find your happiness again. But don’t quit the journey. 2. Get accountable When my goals became non-negotiable, I brought in a crew that would hold me to my vision: a coach, a mentor, or a mastermind partner will keep you accountable. Your vision needs them. Our brains are always wired for the easier option – if you are left to your own devices, you’ll talk yourself out of every uncomfortable action that can help you progress. I joined a gym with my sister and we made sure we met at the same time each morning so we could get back into a fitness routine. There is no way I would ever have gotten out of bed at 5:30am if I didn’t have a buddy meeting me there to share in my early-morning misery. Even if it’s joining a networking group, just get around people who will hold you to a higher standard. Just that one step will propel you to do more. 3. Celebrate everything I’m a future-oriented person, and I am always looking ahead to the next step in my success. But, being so future-minded can sometimes keep you looking at how far you have to go instead of how far you've come. Even if it’s just reaching out to a potential recruiter, landing a client, or doing something new in your personal or professional life, CELEBRATE IT. Every step – big and small – is building your future self. Each week, I look at what I HAVE done and I acknowledge myself for it. Because I showed up and that’s not easy. Celebrate yourself and each step on your journey – you are worth it. The greatest secret of all is that the most successful people aren’t the best – they are just the most persistent. Be one of the rare ones. Your legacy will thank you.
I Just Quit My 9-5 Job, and Here's What I Learned
Two weeks ago, I resigned from my 9-5 job, with no intention of getting another one. The 9-5 life wasn’t for me anymore. I used to thrive off success in my PR and TV career – the late nights, early mornings, media events and various PR crises I had to manage used to pump me with adrenaline, and I loved being the person always connected, on-call and on the go, with a story to tell of the latest 'talent’ drama. I loved it. Until I didn’t. Even when landing my dream job at the BBC in London, I quickly found myself questioning… what was it all for? They were the same issues, same deadlines and emergencies, just with an organization I had always dreamed of working for -- and was thanking my lucky stars every day for. But still… I wasn’t happy. I Just Quit My 9-5 Job, and Here's What I Learned Two years later – after climbing more of the success ladder and still feeling drained, tired and empty (although it was packaged to look successful) -- I finally decided there needed to be another way. So 12 months ago, I started a side business. I had been thinking about for years, but had never had the courage to actually do it. Until I did. It’s been a challenging, exciting and at times hellish journey. But I did it. It was finally time to go full-time into this business I have been building. My time was reaching capacity with my client load, and it was time to go all in. So two weeks ago, I handed in my notice -- to the shock of my manager and colleagues. It’s been interesting to see how people around me have responded to my life-changing decision. Here’s what I've learned since quitting my 9-5: 1. Be honest as soon as you can When you are fully honest about who are you and what you want, and not in a permission-seeking way, people around you respect you a lot more (even if they don’t understand it). 2. You being YOU can be inspiring Being unapologetically yourself gives those around you permission to dream big for themselves. Since sharing my decision, I've had no fewer than five people at work tell me that they've also been "thinking about" what they could do on the side -- including my manager. 3. Don’t let the doubters sway you As soon as resigned, I felt relief. Then peace. I am a resourceful person and can handle anything that comes my way. I have seen others doubt my plan and the likeliness of success, and project their own fears about what is around the corner. People stress out about my decision and wonder how it’s going to work out, but for me it makes perfect sense, so I just don’t even go there. Don’t let the doubters make you question the decision you made. 4. Your plan is your business I had a plan in place, I have a clear vision, and I know what I don’t want. I had been preparing my exit strategy for a long time, but I don’t need to explain it in full detail to those around me. It’s my business and my life. You don’t need to justify your decisions to those around you just to make them feel better about their own decisions. 5. If it’s a must, then do it If there is something you are truly passionate about and are willing to sacrifice for in order to make it happen (and totally go for it like your hair is on fire), then just do it. Sometimes the next step is all you need to get started. I never knew what the outcome would be when I moved to London – but I knew I had to do it. The most successful results don’t usually come from a fully-fledged life strategy, but a simple ‘knowing’ of what you must do next. I made the best decision for me and my family, and for what I desire from my life. Success is inner peace Comedian Johnny Carson once said: “Never continue in a job you don’t enjoy. If you’re happy in what you’re doing, you’ll like yourself, you’ll have inner peace. And if you have that… you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.” That’s the success I am working for now, and I couldn’t be happier.
3 Things You Need to Know About Rejection
I love hearing success stories. The hero story always comes with a hardship which has to be endured before a triumph is seen. It looks easier in the older history books – slay the dragon, kill the evil king, free the prisoners -- okay, maybe I have been watching too much Game of Thrones – but the point is, there is a definite ‘task’ which must be completed before success is earned. Now, in the modern world we live in, it’s a different type of battle we fight. One that doesn’t get spoken about enough in schools or is glossed over in the success stories of the icons we hold in such high regard. Rejection. It’s inevitable. In your career, relationships, family dynamics… forget about being the last person being picked for the basketball team. You can still be dealing with the impact of rejection well into adulthood. It happens. And when it does, it feels SO personal. But it’s not. If you allow it to, it can keep you stuck, quitting before you are meant to and giving up because rejection can sometimes make us question ourselves and the value we bring to those around us. If you don't put it into context, rejection can become a roadblock to your destiny. Here are three things you must know about rejection. 3 Things You Need to Know About Rejection Every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being redirected to something better. - Steve Maraboli 1. The more you challenge yourself, the more rejection you’ll get Yes, you can absolutely protect yourself from this horrid feeling by not doing anything outside of your comfort zone. But on the other side of your comfort zone is: awesomeness, freedom and a life that is SO much better for you. But it does come with a price tag: rejection – plus a side of judgement. I had this when I first started my own business. It’s not fun. The good news is, you do get used to being rejected by people. It’s like a muscle that you have to exercise at first, but once you do, you feel unstoppable -- so keep going, and get used to it. And remember: those people weren’t there for you anyway. Rejection is a wonderful life filter that gets rid of the fake people in your life. 2. Rejection is for your own protection This isn't the advice people love hearing (particularly after a bad break up), but I can tell you from personal experience – THIS IS TRUE. I remember being devastated after not landing what I thought was my ‘dream job’ straight out of university. It was a total rejection from the job I felt I would have been ‘perfect for’ -- which then allowed me to go for a job that was way more prestigious, better paid, and just all around a much better job than the one I had been pining for. The point is, if there is rejection attached to something, it’s not meant for you. It’s that simple. And there is something better, guaranteed. Yes, have a cry (or a Ben and Jerry’s tub) if you must, but then move on – because life has something better in store for you. 3. It’s getting you closer to where you meant to be In sales, we say that every "no" is getting you closer to your "yes." This is true in sales and in life. Rejection is never easy, but you need to know that it’s not a roadblock, but a road sign. A sign to go into a different direction – or to stop, stand still and assess what you need to do next (which is usually to keep going). It can be common to think rejection means you aren’t meant for that ‘thing’ (career, job, business, relationship) – but it’s just part of the process when you are building something or going for something that is outside your normal. Don’t overthink it – and don’t let it keep you from moving forward. Rejection does hurt. But you know what hurts more? Standing still. I know which one I’d prefer.
3 Tips to Stay Patient and Positive When Waiting for Your Breakthrough
Ever been stuck waiting?Sometimes, that job, client, business, partner, house or (insert goal) seems to be taking FOREVER, and it can be easy to spiral down into that "it’s never going to happen" delusion. I say delusion because that is exactly what it is.For every action there is a reaction – and as long as you are taking steps (no matter how small they may seem at the time) – there will be a breakthrough. It’s universal law.But, sometimes we have to fight harder (or differently) for that breakthrough. I know my patience has been tested more times than I can count on this issue. Before I got my first job in TV, I was rejected at least ten times from other jobs.3 Tips to Stay Patient and Positive When Waiting for Your BreakthroughYou usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for.- Craig BruceYour mind is a funny thing. It’s there to protect you, but sometimes it can sabotage you into believing things that are not true, but feel true based on your experience in that moment (after all, what you focus on persists).So, if you are waiting for your breakthrough, here are some tips to prevent you from having a total breakdown, and to help you keep your eye on the prize while you wait for your dreams to come to pass.1. Remind yourself that timing is everythingYou have no idea how many factors have to slot in place before your breakthrough appears. It’s not just about you being ready – it’s about the circumstances, the people, the opportunity being just right for you to be a part of it. While you may feel ready, the other parts or people may not. If you meet your 'future’ spouse but they aren’t in a good place to recognize who you are to them, it won’t be happily ever after. Your dream job may not be so dreamy right now, and something in that team might need to shift before you come in. OR, it may be you – you may still have some lessons that you need to take in. Hard to hear, but sometimes we are blocking our own breakthrough – so look at where you are at and ask yourself, "What do I need to learn here?" I promise you, when it happens you won’t be short-changed. You will feel just right.2. Refocus and wait joyfullyI don’t own a crystal ball. I have no idea when your breakthrough is going to happen. But I know this – how you live waiting, is how you live life. Before I moved to London – I knew for at least a year I was going to make the move. But a lot had to fall in place before I could get on that plane – a visa, money being saved, resigning from my job, selling things. It wasn’t done in two weeks. I had about a six-month period of just 'waiting’ for my next season. Instead of hating every day, I re-focused on my health and made running and cooking my main focus. I also spent time with people I knew I wouldn’t have time with down the road. I filled my schedule with things that would serve me and make me happy. I didn’t stop ‘waiting’ for my breakthrough, but instead of pining for it, I made myself another goal for the transition period. It took up my time and energy and helped me stay positive until I received my visa and could book my ticket. 3. Remember: it’s worth the waitMost people don’t try new things because it makes them uncomfortable or they can’t be bothered waiting. Or they settle for second-best and think "this will do" because they become tired of waiting. I know this – when you are ready to throw in the towel is usually when your breakthrough is right around the corner. Life seems to test you to the limit and then gives you a breather. If you can stick it out, your breakthrough is always closer then you think.Keep going. It’s always worth it in the end.
