Can You Lose Your Religion But Keep Faith?
I do not go to church. I own more than one copy of the Holy Bible. I own more than one copy of the Holy Quran. I never eat anything without giving thanks for it. I pray each day as I awaken and before I go to bed. I have passed this on to my children as well. I have no idea who or what hears me, but I believe that someone does. Can You Lose Your Religion But Keep Faith? I have always had a hard time embracing the thought that there is nothing more than us. Ever since I was a child, from my earliest of memories, growing up in the Virgin Islands, I would look out from the balcony to the horizon over the Caribbean Sea and wonder; what was beyond the horizon. Not simply to the next island but beyond. I would wonder as I looked out, where did humans come from? Why are we here? While I never found an answer, I have always felt in my being that the answer is greater than us. Science never seemed like a good enough reason for leaves to be green at a particular time of year. Yet, especially of late, I have pondered the view of the atheist. I’ve yet to meet one or hear of one who’s view does not seem angry or edgy. I do understand that religion which in virtually any form is SUPPOSED to be about peace, has been served as the scapegoat and excuse for so many atrocities in the history of the world. I also understand that many times, those who are devout will have a tone of judgment in their language or nature, especially when it comes to their opinion of others. For example, how many people do you know that attend church on Sunday and seem more concerned with worshiping the building versus God? Or seem consumed what other parishioners are wearing or some other areas of their business? It becomes easy to see how the lines between religion and faith get blurred and as such, the very idea of religion for some, becomes a complete turn-off. I have always found the definition of faith to be simply, a belief in the unseen. But I would think that faith, in general, has to come before religion. Without it, the words in any book become hard to absorb. Even the atheist must have some faith. Maybe not in the same things as the person who has chosen a religion but they must have faith in some form. Optimism and hope are forms of faith. It seems that one who has no faith would be at peace with the idea that there is nothing to be hopeful about. Could a person with a view that dark believe that there is something worth living for? Could they believe that there is a reason to be here? Do they love or believe in anything or anyone so much that they would be willing to die for it? I ask because I actually wonder Personally, I find value in living a life with the thought that there exists something that is bigger than me or what I see, even if that something is the world itself. Since I can remember, I alway wanted to find the “ultimate faith.” For most of us, our first experience with religion has little to do with choice. Our circumstances dictate which religion is first put upon us. Often we follow with guilt and obligation. Noting faithful or hopeful about that. When I refer to an ultimate faith, I’m referring to a well-informed decision or choice that is made as it relates to faith. Responding to that which resonates with you, allowing it to choose you. My father was raised in an Episcopal home. My grandmother found great comfort in the church, and I often desired the certainty with which she lived her faith. Later in life, my father found, was chosen by, and embraced Islam. He showed my brother and me how to pray in Arabic. He gave us each a copy of the Holy Quran and, over the years, has shared pearls of wisdom and teachings which have nothing to do with the hatred, cowardice, and evil that is perpetrated by certain people around the world. He has never tried to convert me, not even once. This is why I have the books that I have. I still seek. I define myself as more spiritual than religious and as I continue to search and be open to a religion, I will continue to live in faith. To live my life as best I can, as though there is a God. I would rather do so and upon my departure, find out that there is no God. Instead of living my life as though there is no God, only to learn, that there was a God all along. In faith and hope, I will keep you in prayer and whomever you may be, if you are reading this, I love you. This is why I have the books that I do. I seek. I define myself as more spiritual than religious and as I continue to search and be open to an actual religion, I will continue to live in faith. To live my life as best I can, as though there is a God. I would rather do so and upon my departure, find out that there is not God. Instead of living my life as though there is no God, only to learn, that there was a God all along. In faith and hope, I will keep you in prayer and whomever you may be, if you are reading this, I love you.
When Did We Lose Our Sense Of Wonder?
I did a search via Google for the definition of the word wonder, and here is what I found. Wonder-a feeling of surprise mingled with admiration, caused by something beautiful, unexpected, unfamiliar, or inexplicable. "he had stood in front of it, observing the intricacy of the ironwork with the wonder of a child" synonyms: awe, admiration, wonderment, fascination; There were other definitions, all related for sure but this is more than enough to for the purpose of our conversation. How often do you use the word? How often do you stop to actually “wonder”? When we are younger, we begin sentences with “ I wonder if” or “wouldn’t it be great if” or “imagine if”. Where does that go as we get older? At what point does that change? What might our world look like if our school system’s primary objective was to “preserve wonder”? What if we stopped to think about just one thing that the people closest to us may not know about us and share it with them? Share something that might allow them to gain empathy or insight. Then have them do the same with us. When Did We Lose Our Sense Of Wonder? My wife is Mexican-American, I am African-American. When we first started dating years ago, one of my first encounters with her sister’s children went like this. The youngest of the boys who must have been around 5 years old at the time, put his hand on my head and said: “ Shawn, your hair feels like paper”. He was in awe. Had it been an adult that asked, it would be considered rude by most people. In this case, it was evident that my nephew had little or no experience being around black people and the innocence of that moment has always stayed with me. I laughed and thought it was so pure. Just as we should open ourselves up to wondering about each other, we need to be open to receiving it as well, provided that it is sincere. Without it, we could falsely label a person as racist, because of an ignorant but sincere question (for instance, if a white person asked me in all sincerity if I sunburn, should I not embrace their honest wonder?). The lack of wonder in our world today is a large part of the reason why we have failed in the area of race relations, why there is inequality between the sexes, and it limits the quality of our lives when we stop wondering about the world around us in general. When that happens, we stop learning. When we stop learning we stop growing, if we are not growing we are dying.. sometimes literally. We may be alive but we most certainly are not living. Having a natural and sincere curiosity about the world around us is something that I am convinced, keeps us young. I can FEEL the difference in my body as I wonder about almost anything, as I discuss these things with my kids, and they ask about the things that they wonder about. But it’s especially obvious when I wonder out loud. When I actually share my wonder with or, more accurately, to the universe. That may sound odd to some but I dare you to try. As a matter of fact, do just that. Try it for a given period, then respond to me here in the comments and tell me about your experience. Don’t just try it for a day, Give a week or more. It may take more time for some than it will for others to actually stop and get curious. For others, it will take less effort. But I think you’ll be pretty surprised at the results and the effect it can have. I believe there is little merit in asking or inviting others to do that which you won’t do so I will do the same, document my experience, then check back on here to share it and read yours. I hope you’ll join me.
Life’s challenges and gifts come in the same wrapping
Raising a child with special needs takes a few things. It takes patience. It takes time. It takes love. It can take more money than raising a neurotypical child. It takes understanding. It takes not feeling sorry for yourself. Each situation is different depending on the child’s developmental delay but from my perspective, it also gives back so very much. It not only takes patience, but it’s actually given me patience. It gives me love. It gives me understanding. It gives me lessons on a daily basis. There is no way that I would be the person I am or strive to be if it were not for my son. Not just autism but Elijah, himself, has taught me that the best of me is not even about me because who I strive to become determines who as well as what, I have to give to myself and others beyond my family. It determines what my legacy will be, what value I bring to others. This is so because it takes a better version of yourself to help a child with special needs reach his/her full potential. Our son Elijah is 10 years old. He was diagnosed with autism at the age of three. Having had two daughters from her previous marriage, my wife was especially aware that there were certain things with development that seemed behind or missing. I did not see or notice anything. Oh yeah, it also helps to have a spouse who is a soldier of love, a warrior for her family and one who makes you better. I am a man blessed to have that, and more in my wife, Laura. Through her diligence, tenacity, and research, we got Elijah into early intervention before the age of three for 1-2 years. I honestly do not recall for the simple fact that much of that period and a portion of the years that followed were a blur. When Elijah was roughly three years old, we became legal guardians to my sister in law’s four children then aged 4 to 11. That process much like raising any child with special needs took a lot. As a matter of fact, it became obvious that it would take so much that though we were just 4 years into our marriage, my wife gave me an out so to speak, by telling me that she would understand if I wanted to leave our marriage. I was borderline offended at first because all I could think was that she had misunderstood the seriousness with which I took our vows. But that was making it about me. I did not realize until after the fact that this was the greatest example of not taking me for granted. We knew all along that certain life circumstances and choices would likely cause us to have to eventually step in and raise her sister’s children, but we did not anticipate it happening as suddenly as it did or when it did. I cannot imagine the life that would be had I thought for a second about taking my wife up on her offer to leave. Let me reiterate because it’s easy to misunderstand and think that I’ve said I cannot imagine what life would be like if I left. The things that life can take from us, has an equal ability to give to us. I said that I cannot (and refuse to) imagine a life where I even thought about leaving because the thought never once entered my mind, though I love my wife even more for thinking enough of me for offering. But to get back to my original point, the things that life can take from us, has an equal ability to give to us. If we choose to receive it. I’m not perfect, and I can’t say that I always have the right attitude or response to life’s challenges, but I’ve developed the ability to at least catch myself when that happens and make adjustments, especially when it comes to my children. ALL of them, but especially Elijah. The extra care that he needs causes me to look at myself and find ways to be a better husband, father, and person. Each person's challenge in life is different, and as you read this, you may face things that are mountains compared to my hills, but I assure you that no matter what we face; how we respond to it is more important than the obstacle itself.
Do We Really Have Freedom?
By now, most people are familiar with the matter surrounding San Francisco 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick and his choice to sit versus stand, during the national anthem. Kaepernick has explained that his protest was in response to the recent incidents of police brutality that have led to the deaths of black people in the U.S. One could ask the question: "Is the situation as bad as it is portrayed in the media?" We can clearly see that there is a division on both sides of the matter but what is undeniable, is that Colin Kaepernick has succeeded in bringing attention to the issue and getting people to actually talk about it. We have to acknowledge that there is, in fact, an issue, and while Kaepernick’s star is not shining as brightly as it did when he led the 49rs to the Super Bowl in 2012, he is still an active player with many endorsements that could now be jeopardized. Just recently, he signed a massive contract with the 49ers that will pay him an estimated $12 million dollars this season, but he has certainly put his legacy on the line with his choice to sit during the anthem. Many people, as to be expected, have voiced considerable offense to his decision to stay on the ground, while others have praised him for it. And while everyone is debating whether Colin should have stood during the anthem, we miss the point; How can we disagree with someone's right to protest, even if we might disagree with his opinion? The lack of desire to see other people’s points of view is tearing this world apart. For example, United States Gold medal winner Gabby Douglas was recently fed considerable vitriol for not placing her hand over her heart during the medal ceremony and was called unpatriotic. Just days later when Ryan Crouser and Joe Kovacs, who are both white men, stood with their hands at their sides as the national anthem played during their silver medal ceremony, nobody even questioned their patriotism. When pole vaulter Sam Kendricks who is a Lieutenant in the U.S. Army reserves, stopped in mid-stride and to put down his pole and acknowledge the national anthem as it began to play (with his hands at his side), it was seen as patriotic, and rightfully so. He became an Internet sensation with nearly 17 million views on Youtube. Nobody questioned his patriotism. Sam Kendricks stops pole vault mid-attempt when he hears national anthem: I know of at least one occasion where United States President Barack Obama did not have his hand over his heart during the national anthem, and he too was called less the patriotic. There is a picture taken during one of this year’s Republican Presidential debates that show all candidates standing with their hands over their hearts with the obvious exception of party nominee Donald Trump. Not only has his patriotism not come into question, but if you were to ask his supporters, he is in their eyes, the very picture of patriotism. The point is that there is a double standard on how tolerant people are to "unpatriotic" signs. When Muhammad Ali passed way this summer, there was an outpouring of love and respect that still remains. This was a man who at one point risked his career and tested the love of his fanbase to fight for political and humanitarian causes. I wonder just how those same people would receive Ali if he were born in 1987 like Colon Kaepernick, we need only look at the very response that Kaepernick has received. I would be interested to see how many people that are offended by Kaepernick, hold Ali in high esteem. It’s more than fine to disapprove of Kaepernick’s choice but to dislike, or boycott him, is to have lost sight of the very thing that this country was built on; Freedom. We cannot continue to speak of freedom only when it suits our views or try to take away someone else's rights just because we don't agree with what that person has to say. We need to approach this situation with some semblance of curiosity and try to understand other people’s perspectives without necessarily having to agree with them. We don't need to bend other people's views to suit our own opinion. Accept that some people will just have a different viewpoint on the same matter. Isn't this what a democracy is all about? We need first to look inside ourselves and be honest; are we being biased in our views? Then we need to look at other people and try to understand where they come from and actually care, be curious and learn what they have to teach us, even if we do not agree.