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After a Breakup, She Wrote Her Name on a Dollar and Spent It Years Later, It Came Back to Her From the Man She Would Marry
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After a Breakup, She Wrote Her Name on a Dollar and Spent It Years Later, It Came Back to Her From the Man She Would Marry

*Featured image contains photo by Jonathan BorbaPaul Grachan had been out on a few dates with Esther. Things just seemed to click, and he decided to make things more official and ask Esther to be his girlfriend. He called Esther and the two made dinner plans for the end of the week.The next day, Paul ran to the grocery store to pick up a few things. After bagging his groceries and taking his change from the clerk, which consisted of a few dollar bills, his next stop was a neighbourhood deli to pick up a sandwich for lunch. Paul remembers that otherwise unremarkable moment when he took out his wallet to pay for his sandwich. “I pulled out the couple bucks' change that I had gotten from the [grocery] store, handed the clerk one of the ones. And then I looked at it and I pulled it back.”He Decided to Keep the DollarPhoto by Karolina GrabowskaThat’s because, on the bill was written the name ‘Esther.’ He thought it was a sweet coincidence and decided to keep it. He thought it would be fun to give it to Esther and tell the story during their dinner on Friday. Later, he decided to go an extra step and frame the dollar bill. He bought a gold frame and wrapped it up."So it was floating in the middle on this piece of gold,” Paul recalls, “as if you're going to go in a church in Italy and they had a fragment from the robe of some saint or something like that. And I called it the Immaculate Dollar of Arlington Heights.” Paul thought it would be a fun way to provide a moment of connection before he asked Esther to be his girlfriend. He wasn’t expecting much more of a reaction than a smile.It Wasn’t the Reaction He Was Looking ForBut when Paul presented the framed dollar as a gift, Esther was speechless. Instead of smiling, she looked deeply worried. Paul tried to lighten the mood, explaining, “It’s a dollar bill with your name on it.” But to Esther, it was much more than that.But Esther wouldn’t explain. She waved it off, telling Paul that it was nothing, to remind her to tell him a story later. Paul just wanted to enjoy the moment with his new girlfriend, so he let it drop. The Dollar Bill ResurfacesIt would be several years before Paul saw the framed dollar bill again. Paul and Esther’s relationship had only gotten stronger. They got engaged and were married. One afternoon, as they were unpacking boxes in their new home, Paul found the photo frame wrapped in paper.Smiling to himself, he walked into the bedroom to find Esther. He held up the photo frame and said, “Hey, you never told me about this dollar. What’s the deal with that?” He remembered her concerned look the moment that he had given it to her.Esther knew that it was time to tell the story. She started slowly, “I knew that we were going to be married the day that you gave me this dollar bill.”The Dollar Bill That Defined Their LivesPhoto by Rodrigo Souza“It was pretty crazy,” Paul remembers. Esther went on to tell him that years before meeting him, she was coming out of a failed relationship. Rather than dwell on it, she decided upon a symbolic act that would help her move forward. She took a pencil and wrote her name on a few dollar bills. She spent them and imagined their journey through the world, saying to herself, “The guy that gets this dollar bill is going to be the guy that asks me to marry him.”Years later, when Paul presented her with one of those dollar bills in a gold frame, it took her breath away. In the moment, Esther froze, not wanting to say anything that would scare off her new boyfriend: “I didn't want to freak this guy out and be like, what, this girl's already talking about marriage?”But in her heart, Esther knew Paul was the one. And as destiny would have it, the two ended up in a serious relationship, eventually getting married.A Beautiful Symbol of ConnectionPaul says he’s not one to put much emphasis on coincidences, but the story of Esther’s dollar bill hit too close to home. “Now it just sits in that very same frame up on our dresser,” he says, “and I look at it every day that I wake up. Sometimes I remind her that we have it when she's upset at me or angry.”Esther agrees that the dollar bill makes her feel even more connected to her husband; she’s comfortable in the knowledge that Paul is her soulmate. The two have been married for almost 30 years.“I know I'm stuck with you,” Esther says to Paul. “You got this dollar bill.” The universe does indeed work in mysterious and wonderful ways.More from Goalcast:Woman Diagnosed With Rare Genetic Disorder Wonders if She’ll Ever Find Love – Then One Man Steps in With the AnswerVeteran Spends 70 Years Searching for the Lost Love of His Life – At 91, He Finally Finds Her

Antonio Banderas Didn't Give Up On Love Despite Being In A Disastrous First Marriage
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Antonio Banderas Didn't Give Up On Love Despite Being In A Disastrous First Marriage

Antonio Banderas is universally endeared as a charming, romantic Latin Lover, but in reality, he has been unlucky in love more often than not. In his forty years as an actor, he’s been married and divorced twice, with both of his marriages ending on drastically different outcomes. Everyone’s well-acquainted with his love for Melanie Griffith — their marital union lasted for nearly twenty years and produced a daughter, actress Stella del Carmen Banderas — but not many are aware of Antonio’s personal life prior to his move to the United States, namely, his ill-advised wedding with Ana Leza. The way their marriage panned out isn’t just a cautionary tale for anyone acting on their impulses and pinning their hopes on a whirlwind romance; it’s a lesson in not giving up on your heart, come hell or high water. Against all odds, Antonio’s failures don’t dissuade him from searching for The One; he continues to persevere in his quest to find love, even if it culminates in a great deal of pain, distrust, and heartbreak. Here’s what we can take away from Antonio Banderas’ journey with love:Antonio had to pay a hefty fine for his first marriage with Ana LezaIn a Vanity Fair interview, Antonio opened up about his brash decision to marry Ana and why their relationship couldn’t go the distance. She was a fellow actress and his English tutor, who essentially instructed him on how he could develop his craft in mainstream cinema. “She helped me translate the script for 'Los Reyes del Mambo,' ... it gave me a lot of confidence,” said Antonio, giving her her due credit for helping him establish a sustainable career in Hollywood. The Zorro lead said he wouldn’t have the acclaim he does today without Ana’s continuous support and direction. “Without her I would not have gotten the role,” he said. Ana backed up his statement by saying it was “imperative” to accompany him to the United States. He didn’t speak a word of English, so it felt natural to have Ana be this perpetual plus-one. They tied the knot in 1986 after just six months of dating. Antonio Banderas with Ana LezaWhat the judge wants to know is how much are you going to pay your partner. They grab you by one foot, they shake you and, when [they get every last dollar], they leave you. That's what they did with meAntonio Banderas to Vanity Fair EspañaIt wasn’t until Antonio came across Melanie Griffith on the set of Too Much that he realized he needed to break it off with Ana. He maintains he didn’t carry out an illicit affair with Melanie; instead, he waited to separate from Ana to pursue a serious partnership with Melanie. “It was very, very fast and very compulsive, but at the same time, we were tied at the time,” said Antonio, of how his infatuation for Melanie transformed into genuine love over the years. Unfortunately, the divorce with Ana wasn’t as seamless as he had been hoping. To put it simply, it was a nasty, expensive divorce battle in which the court ordered Antonio to pay alimony payments of 12,000 euros per month, awarded his €3.4 million home to Ana, and granted her lifetime rights of 50% of all the films he acted in over the duration of their marriage. Antonio bemoaned the process, calling it a “business” through and through. He doesn’t think he should’ve been mandated to fork over so many assets; in his view, the whole system is a scheme to bleed an actor dry. Yet he never stopped believing in the power of loveThough his marriage to Ana was, in many ways, doomed to collapse at some point or the other, it didn’t put a damper on his beautiful love story with Melanie Griffith. The two fell madly in love when they first met, and with their respective marriages declining, they couldn’t help but give in to the passion brewing between them. At the time, their getting together precipitated quite the controversy — Antonio was described as “abandoning” his wife of ten years for a sexy, on-set fling. However, in an interview published in 1995, the Spanish actor has no qualms about following his heart and exploring the love he felt powerfully for his co-star. “You just know there is something inside you that is stronger than yourself,” he told The Morning Call. Love is an abstract concept that will consume your focus without your permission and embolden you to make strange, the most unexpected, choices in life. Likewise, when he encountered Melanie, he couldn’t think straight. He had to make up his mind. Melanie Griffith and Antonio BanderasLove is a very abstract feeling. I cannot even describe love. Who can describe love? It's like describing life. You just know there is something inside you that is stronger than yourself. And you can't stop it.Antonio Banderas on The Morning CallIn an Entertainment Weekly interview published the same year, Antonio changed his stance a tiny bit and claimed his separation with Ana had “no connection” with his budding romance with Melanie. It’s futile to speculate whether or not Melanie’s arrival directly resulted in the breakdown of Antonio’s marriage since the situation transpired over twenty-five years ago. Additionally, as lovely as their partnership had been, Antonio and Melanie didn’t last, either. They announced their divorce in June 2014, noting they wanted to go their separate ways “in a loving and friendly manner.” Their parting of ways has been more than amicable: Antonio called Melanie his “best friend” and asserted he “will love her until the day I die.” Just because a marriage ended doesn’t mean it has to be ugly or heartless. People can still maintain their friendship, acknowledge their love, and preserve some level of togetherness. On the other hand, the act of divorce itself doesn’t have to signify failure or inadequacy. Sometimes, like Antonio, you act on a whim and do what you think is best for your future, unaware of any ramifications. He and Ana weren’t meant to be, but he never lost his ability to love and be loved in return. He welcomed his desire for Melanie with arms wide open and embraced the changes in his life. Keep your heart and your mind openToday, Antonio may be a twice-divorced actor in his sixties in Hollywood, yet he doesn’t let an arbitrary label determine his success with love. He’s happily partnered up with Dutch investment banker Nicole Kimpel, who’s helping him recover from a heart attack he suffered four years ago. He’s a walking testament to the resilience of love and how it can strengthen a person from the inside out. Divorce can be a life-shattering phenomenon that can send individuals down a dark path full of insecurities, doubts, and disillusionment. But if you maintain a semblance of positivity and optimism, you will be able to crawl your way out. It’s about keeping your heart and mind open to possibilities, even if they don’t turn out as you hope or end up breaking your heart. If you don’t let love in, you’ll never know what it feels like. More inspiring stories:The Truth Behind Dakota Johnson and Antonio Banderas’ Heartwarming RelationshipThe Reason Why Dakota Johnson’s Parents Sent Her To Therapy At Age 3Relationship Goals: Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas Prove Bad First Impressions Can Be RemediedJamie Dornan and Amelia Warner’s Marriage Epitomizes Unconditional Love

Aaliyah’s Tragic Love Story With Damon Dash Will Teach You To Take Chances
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Aaliyah’s Tragic Love Story With Damon Dash Will Teach You To Take Chances

Aaliyah’s been gone twenty years, but the footprint she’s left behind is unmistakable. The Princess of R&B, along with eight others, tragically passed away in an airplane crash over the Bahamas on August 25, 2001. It’s the kind of death that’s capable of decimating and devastating an entire culture, where no one recovers from the sudden loss of potential; where no one can process how a universally beloved figure, with countless media appearances to her name, can just cease to exist in a matter of few minutes. There’s something eerily personal about a celebrity’s passing. They might be dead, but their artistry still shines through, their work is still available to be cherished and adapted and celebrated an infinite number of times over. Similarly, Aaliyah’s death continues to draw out heartfelt tributes and nostalgic reactions, revealing bit by bit the woman who lived beneath the glamor and the chaos. To give an example: on the occasion of Aaliyah’s 20th death anniversary, her boyfriend at the time, Damon Dash, opened up about their unique love story, and in doing so, unearthed yet another magical piece about the artist. Aaliyah's boyfriend opens up about their relationshipDamon Dash, a media tycoon, entrepreneur, film producer, and co-founder of Roc-A-Fella with Jay-Z and Kareem Burke, had been dating Aaliyah for about a year before she was killed in the airline accident.They met at a basketball game in the summer of 2000 before being introduced by their mutual accountant, Barry Klarberg.Though they took a liking to each other nearly immediately, they intended to maintain a friendship and nothing else. In an interview with Entertainment Tonight, Damon delves into their beginnings as a couple and excavates a side of Aaliyah many might not recall. At first, he and Aaliyah bonded over a book, Gary Zukav’s The Seat of the Soul, which they started reading together. The intellectual, thought-provoking conversions that emerged, as a result, solidified their connection for good. “From then on, we were sort of inseparable,” he told the outlet. Soon enough, sparks began to fly, and they decided they would give their budding romance a serious chance.Our intention at first wasn’t even to be in love. We were just really good friends and we fell for real. It was almost an accident. Damon Dash on Entertainment TonightDamon couldn’t be more thankful about how they were able to forge an intimate and memorable relationship away from the prying eyes of the public. The 50-year-old also revealed they wanted to marry each other at one point but didn’t want to make the grave mistake of rushing down the aisle. That’s why they agreed upon a plan: they would cohabit for six months straight, “see if we can tolerate being around each other with no distractions,” and if they still loved each other at the end of the period, they would make it official. Unfortunately, the plan never came to fruition, and they weren’t able to tie the knot. He says she taught him how to loveTwenty years on, Damon has a number of regrets about his time with Aaliyah, one of which was that he didn’t get to make enough memories with her. They were both busy, ambitious people mired in a series of projects, so they didn’t have a lot of time to give to each other. She would be shooting a film in Australia, and he would be occupied with “companies to run” — their schedules kept clashing every step of the way. Nevertheless, Damon said, “We would have such a good time when we saw each other, it just always felt fresh.”Of course, the moments they shared were irrevocably special, and he’ll always be in awe of the woman who changed his life. But, at the end of the day, when the love of your life is gone, nothing is enough, and you are left longing for their warm company every second. Aaliyah taught Damon how to love, how to live every day with passion, interest, and unending appreciation. Had it not been for her, he wouldn’t know how to acknowledge or recognize love in himself or others. I didn’t know what being in love was. I didn’t even understand what that feeling is and I was able to really achieve that with her. Now I know what it feels like, so I was able to identify it when it happened again. Damon Dash on Entertainment Tonight As a tribute to Aaliyah or a result of her impact on him, he makes sure to spend every waking moment with people he genuinely loves. “I would only be around people I love,” he said. He doesn’t care to surround himself with people who don’t treasure him. He’s also begun to take account of his own feelings to the point it’s become the sole “currency” in how he navigates through this world. Damon also takes pleasure in the fact that he was the one who dated her until the very end. If someone else had been in his position, he would have been seething in envy, so he allows himself to feel grateful for the part he played in her life, and vice versa. “It's almost amazing to me that I was the guy who was with Aaliyah. Like, I am almost a fan of myself,” he said. It’s ultimately an unfortunate situation, but this part does enable him to reflect on the past with a fresh perspective. Grief is a transformative process at its essence, so every person will come to grips with reality at their own pace, in their own time. For Damon, it comforts him to picture Aaliyah as an angel, someone watching over her loved ones in fierce protection and dedication. “They're signs to me, it means she's talking to me,” he said. Dare to take chances and fall in loveNobody really knows what will occur in the future, but if you want to keep the regrets as minimal as possible, don’t be afraid to take chances. There are a hundred ways you could get hurt, but at least you can tell yourself you showed up, you fell in love, and you risked your heart. There’s no bigger failure than not trying at all, so if you decide to take a chance, you’re opening yourself up to a world of possibilities. You never know if the person you share a profound connection with disappears the following day, so all you can do is give your everything, live in the moment, and follow your heart. More inspiring stories: Aaliyah’s Forgotten Light: Her Powerful Legacy Beyond Death — and R. KellyTina Turner Beat the Odds by Leaving Ike– and She’s Still Shining at Age 80Inside Missy Elliott’s Secret Illness and Triumphant ComebackLizzo’s Journey From Rock Bottom to Radical Positivity

How Diane Kruger Learned To Make the Right Relationship Decisions — Not the Easy Ones
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How Diane Kruger Learned To Make the Right Relationship Decisions — Not the Easy Ones

Diane Kruger did not have an easy 2016. First, she and longtime boyfriend Joshua Jackson broke up that July after a decade together. Then, in November, she found herself mourning the death of her stepfather. What’s more, she was dealt another blow when she lost her grandmother — and it all happened in the span of eight months. As she told Vulture in December 2017, “I felt like I was drowning.” Opening up about her breakup, the “Inglourious Basterds” star told the outlet it left her feeling sad, rather than angry. Noting that it “was a long time coming,” she shared, “You don’t break up overnight after ten years, you know what I mean?” And while the actress didn’t get into too many details, she did admit that it was her choice and that she knew it was the right one. If not the easy one. Speaking with Boston Common, she explained, “I think life’s better with somebody holding your hand, but I’ve also learned that I need to take care of myself first. In the past, I’ve been incredibly disappointed in people,” she admitted, adding, “You think you’re moving toward the same goal, and then you’re not.” She also told WWD how, “as we get older, people tend to take less risks. There’s so much to lose and it’s so hard to move on from a situation that is not good for you anymore,” she explained, saying, “I’m certainly guilty of that.” Joshua Jackson and Diane Kruger as we get older, people tend to take less risks. There’s so much to lose and it’s so hard to move on from a situation that is not good for you anymore. I’m certainly guilty of that.Diane Kruger to WWDAnd while she didn’t cherish the idea of breaking up, she did make the most of it. For one, she used it as a learning experience. “There are certain things I won’t accept anymore,” she said, noting, “I think when you’re in a long-term relationship, you start making excuses, and you’re making a lot of compromises — which obviously you need to make to make things work — but I think there are certain things that I’ve learned I don’t want to accept anymore,” she concluded.Kruger also used the split as an opportunity to focus on herself and her work. She moved to New York City from Los Angeles; she learned to ride a motorcycle; and she threw herself into acting. “It felt liberating because I didn’t have to worry about that anymore, so I could immerse myself 100 percent into something else,” she told Vulture. Diane Kruger and Norman Reedus turned an unexpected connection into a beautiful union The result? A German thriller called In the Fade in which Kruger plays a woman mourning the murder of both her husband and son. Vulture dubbed it “the bravest performance of her career” and, indeed, the actress admitted that shedding the heaviness of the role “was a long process.” Especially because she was still “grieving the loss of my stepdad,” but luckily, her family and friends were there to support her, as was Norman Reedus. The notoriously private couple — “I don’t want to talk about that part of my life; That’s one thing I learned,” Kruger told Boston Common — went public in March 2017 and as she told the mag, she felt “lucky” to have him “just be present and walk that walk with me to the light.” Diane Kruger and Norman Reedus first met on the set of 2015’s Sky and quickly built a strong rapport. The actress was still dating Jackson at the time and admitted to People that meeting Reedus, who plays her love interest in the flick, came with some jitters. “I was really nervous about meeting him and not being able to have a drink with him, or talk with him” before shooting “a lot of intimate scenes,” she shared. But there was nothing to fear and she was soon “pleasantly surprised” as she discovered that the actor is nothing like the characters he so often plays. Praising him for being “so relaxed,” Kruger enthused, “He’s really easygoing, very gentle.” As for Reedus, he dubbed Kruger “a dream” to work with and called her “the prettiest of co-stars” on Instagram.Norman Reedus and Diane Kruger I think when you’re in a long-term relationship, you start making excuses, and you’re making a lot of compromises — which obviously you need to make to make things work — but I think there are certain things that I’ve learned I don’t want to accept anymore.Diane KrugerThat admiration eventually turned into a love connection and while their unexpected union raised some eyebrows (E! even called it “unexpected”), an insider told Us Weekly in 2018 that “opposites attract” and that’s certainly true for Kruger and Reedus. Calling her “so buttoned up and put together” and him “rough around the edges,” the source assured they “are so different, but they really do work” because “they complement one another.” Turns out that source really knew what they were talking about. Jump to November 2018 and the couple confirmed they had welcomed their first child together and in 2019, Kruger gushed to People about how “very great” Reedus is with their daughter. He just looks at her with unconditional love. I wish he would look at me like that,” she quipped. What’s more, Reedus’ teenage son from his previous relationship with Helena Christensen effortlessly joined their blended family. “19 years is a big gap so he’s really stepping up to be this protective big brother,” Kruger shared. Diane's tough love approach led her to her perfect partnerAnd while they do like to keep things private, Kruger has posted plenty of heartfelt messages to her beau on social media. Taking to Instagram on Thanksgiving 2018, she enthused, “I have A LOT to be thankful for this year and I count my lucky stars to have met you [Norman] and for sharing life’s many blessings with you.” In 2020, she celebrated his 51st birthday by gushing, “My teenage dream of a man right here! HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the love of my life” and on Father’s Day 2021, she called him “the one with the sweetest heart.” She also joked about having to quarantine together, writing, “If we survived this year together we’re in it for the long haul.” She wasn’t kidding. In August 2021, People confirmed that Kruger and Reedus had gotten engaged after celebrating their five-year anniversary, proving that Kruger’s tough new approach to love sure paid off. The right decision isn’t always the easy one but fear should never prevent us from following our instincts and searching for what really makes us happy. Diane Kruger shows us just how imperative that is and the fulfilment and joy that can come from doing what's best for you.More inspiring stories:How Joshua Jackson and Jodie Turner-Smith’s Romance Defied All ObstaclesJennifer Aniston’s Choice To Not Have Children With Brad Pitt Is Not The Reason Their Marriage FailedBarbra Streisand and James Brolin’s Advice for a Successful Marriage Is Seriously SimpleAdriana Lima’s Unconventional Stance On Intimacy Before Marriage Challenges Expectations

Why Drew Barrymore's Raw Revelation About Divorce Shaming Will Empower You
Heartbreak

Why Drew Barrymore's Raw Revelation About Divorce Shaming Will Empower You

In our modern times, divorce has become as commonplace as breathing. It’s a near-guarantee for nearly half the couples that get married. If there’s a 50% chance your marriage won’t make the distance, would you still walk down the aisle?Some of our dearest celebrities have been through the painful process and are opening up about the toll it takes on your mental health, self-esteem, and general ability to function in society. Drew Barrymore has been around the block a few times; as a result, she is constantly reflecting on her choices and trying to figure out where each of her unions went oh-so-wrong. As a woman in her forties with three marriages under her belt, she is all too familiar with the stigma surrounding the very act of getting a divorce and how it severely impacts how you’re perceived in your community or within your circle. People won’t offer a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on, but they’ll be sure to judge you like there’s no tomorrow. Here’s what we can take away from Drew Barrymore’s disheartening experience of “divorce shame”: Drew felt like the ultimate “failure” for getting divorcedIn an interview with Chelsea Handler, Drew describes divorce as significantly worse than a breakup. Outside of the complicated litigation, it proves that you made a severe misjudgment with regard to your personal life. You couldn’t find a happily-ever-after with your spouse, and so you’re essentially reneging on the vows you made so assuredly in your wedding ceremony. In short, it’s typical to feel like a “failure.” Drew Barrymore and Will Kopelman When you get divorced, you're like, 'I'm the biggest failure. This is the biggest failure.' It's so shameful and hard to actually go through that, even privately. Drew Barrymore on ChelseaDrew addressed the stigma in the initial divorce announcement itself. “Divorce might make one feel like a failure, but eventually you start to find grace in the idea that life goes on,” the statement read. The Never Been Kissed actor later explained to Chelsea she intended to use the word “failure” to accurately detail her frame of mind following the separation. Everything she’d built with her ex, Will Kopelman, was in jeopardy, and she told herself repeatedly she could have done better. It’s only natural to feel as though you’ve failed your loved ones by not trying hard enough. Drew Barrymore and her second husband Tom GreenIt’s like, I don’t think I’ve recovered from that. I don’t know how to open that up again. It’s like something closed, and it stayed closed. Drew Barrymore on Sunday TodayAt first, she couldn’t even process the development. “I took it really hard,” she told Sunday Today. She didn’t for a second believe the marriage wouldn’t be “forever.” That’s the expectation you carry as you tie the knot with your partner — you hope to be with them until the end of the road. You can’t imagine a single day where they’re not your husband or wife, so when it emerges that the relationship isn’t sustainable in its current form anymore, the revelation hits you like a ton of bricks. In fact, Drew Barrymore said there’s a part of her that’s still in shock and will not recover for a long time. When it’s your third time dissolving a marriage, and you still have to ensure you can successfully co-parent with your ex-husband, it’s going to be a steep learning curve. Divorce is a laborious set of circumstances through and through; it will, in most cases, trigger a sense of shame and self-loathing in you, and you’ll have to be patient to overcome the negativity. It took her five long years to recover and gain an appreciation for her marriageThink about it: you showcased your love before the entire world, made these sweeping promises, and put everything on paper. This person was supposed to be The One, so you can’t help but ask yourself what you could have done better to improve the situation. The entire ordeal has sowed seeds of doubt in your mind about whether or not you deserve love in the first place. Do you automatically start believing you’ll screw up every single romantic commitment in the future?When it’s just your run-of-the-mill breakup, it hurts, but you tell yourself there’s plenty of other fish in the sea. As Drew put it, you simply say, “yeah, that didn't work,” and can move on with relatively little damage or consequence. A breakup is seen as an ordinary, if not necessary, part of your evolution — you’ll come across someone, fall in love, the connection will fade, and you'll just meet someone new. The world will keep spinning.Drew Barrymore and her first husband Jeremy ThomasIt took me five years to be able to speak with strength, articulation, perspective, hindsight, and see everything we did right. Because when we were getting divorced, it felt like everything was just wrong.Drew Barrymore to Sunday TodayHowever, divorce is an exponentially bigger deal because marriage is an exponentially bigger deal. You’re signing a legal contract with your partner, so when the agreement gets violated, it’s only instinctive to feel as though you’re doing not only amoral but also straight-up unlawful. Not to mention women face the brunt of the judgment when a relationship falls apart. Everyone jumps in to applaud and sympathize with the man, whereas the women are made to feel like they’ve defied their purpose on earth. If you can’t be a suitable wife, what else are you good for?Drew said it took her five long years to get to a point where she could discuss her divorce from a healthy standpoint. In her case, she had to undergo the five stages of grief systematically to reclaim some sense of self-belief. As a child of divorce, she was determined not to repeat her parents’ mistakes and wanted to ensure her daughters were raised in a stable environment, complete with a mom and dad who loved each other to death. When she discovered she had reached the same juncture her parents had over three decades ago, she didn’t know how to make sense of the moment. It felt like an immeasurable tragedy from her perspective. Marriage will test you every step of the way At the end of the day, a marriage that both lasts long and keeps the parties fulfilled is nothing short of a miracle. If you realize your marriage is better off not existing, keep in mind you’re not a failure. You’re one of the millions of people who decide to go through the arduous journey, so as long as you do what’s right for your heart and your loved ones, you’ll be okay. Before you pursue a long-term relationship and consider getting married, ask yourself whether you and your partner are truly ready. You might be mature enough, you might have financial stability, you both love and trust each other immensely, but you could still be woefully ill-equipped. Marriage is a whole different ballgame that’s going to test you every step of the way, but if you’re actually prepared, it will be the most rewarding choice of your life. More inspiring stories: How Adam Sandler Saved Drew Barrymore AgainHow Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore Managed To Maintain A 30-Year FriendshipDrew Barrymore’s Reaction to Being Cheated On Will Empower You5 Daily Habits to Steal from Drew Barrymore, Including Her Glass-Half-Full Attitude

Selena Gomez's "Cursed Relationships" Yield a Fundamental Lesson For All of Us
Celebrities

Selena Gomez's "Cursed Relationships" Yield a Fundamental Lesson For All of Us

Relationship failures aren’t unique phenomena by any means, but the set of circumstances under which celebrities pursue romances is nothing short of extraordinary. Every action is noted, every move scrutinized; you can’t even get away with liking someone’s post nowadays without sending the tabloids into a frenzy. No interview is complete until you’re asked about your previous partner, how the breakup came to be, how hurt you are, what kind of role they occupy in your life - the list goes on and on. An average person doesn’t have to spend years dissecting their prior romantic involvements, but when you’re in the public eye, you will be asked to dig into those memories over and over again, oftentimes for the sake of content, promotion, or profit. Just look at Selena Gomez: the former Disney star is one of the most successful singers, actresses, and entrepreneurs of our time, and yet questions pertaining to Justin Bieber and The Weeknd keep circling around her like it’s the only thing she’s known for. Thankfully, she takes the pressure in stride and is keen on transforming her troubles into opportunities for growth, wisdom, and self-discovery. Here’s what we can learn from her efforts to forge her path forward:She thinks her relationship history is “cursed” In an interview with Vogue Australia, Selena opens up about the trials and tribulations of falling in love when you’re young and in the spotlight. The 29-year-old said she’s always felt “less than” her boyfriends, and that those connections, as passionate as they may have seemed at the time, lacked equality and emotional maturity. She doesn’t elaborate on how this inequality manifested, but she does detail the severe toll it took on her self-esteem. Selena Gomez And Justin BieberI think most of my experiences in relationships have been cursed. I’ve been way too young to be exposed to certain things when I was in relationships [...] felt so less than in past relationships, and never really felt equal. Selena Gomez in Vogue AustraliaIt’s no secret Justin Bieber was and continues to be one of the most tremendous forces in the music industry. As a teen idol, however, he brought about an unprecedented level of chaos everywhere he went, with hordes of young girls screaming and going berserk over his each and every quirk. He became the subject of many an inappropriate fantasy, and therefore, Selena, Bieber’s longtime girlfriend, started becoming portrayed as a villain in the saga, someone who must be slandered and defeated to bring the illusion into fruition. This doesn’t just apply to Justin Bieber — her other ex-boyfriends, The Weeknd, Nick Jonas, Niall Horan, command similar craze in their respective circles, and their ascendancy into heartthrob status and sex symbolism bore serious consequences for Selena’s image as well as her internal frame of mind.Of course, this doesn’t necessarily constitute the reason why Selena felt less “equal,” but it might explain why it’s been an uphill battle to learn how to value herself and appreciate her individuality. The Only Murders In The Building actress says she was also far too young and naive to experience the hardship of scrutiny and audience obsession, which only becomes worse when you’re trying to date the most beloved pop star in the universe. It’s no surprise why she believes her relationships have been “cursed.”But she's happy with herself and is "growing in the right direction"There is no denying Selena Gomez has been put through the wringer in these entanglements. In previous interviews, she confirmed that she’d been a victim of emotional “abuse” and that it took immense reflection and self-care on her part to clamber her way out of the shame. It’s widely believed Justin Bieber is the perpetrator, though Selena steadfastly refuses to name him; at the same time, the Texas native does say that the same bond had been “beautiful,” but it was time to move on nonetheless. As for The Weeknd, she and the Canadian singer are amicable as ever post-breakup and support each other in all their professional ventures. The singer admits it’s been essential for her to focus on mental and physical health to feel confident, loved, and “rare.” She’s latched onto the last word not just as a branding slogan but as a way to empower herself when she’s at her most vulnerable and distressed. That’s why she’s centering her music, business, and advocacy around the concept of “rare” and everything it embodies. Selena Gomez and The Weeknd It’s only gotten better, and that’s kind of what people say, you know, when you get older, you feel a bit more confident with who you are. I don’t know if that’s gonna be every year for me. Maybe it is. But I just feel like I’m constantly growing in the right direction.Selena Gomez to Vogue AustraliaAs she nears her thirties, Selena is enormously proud of the milestones she’s achieved in both the personal and professional realms. “I’m just really happy with who I am,” she told Vogue. She recognizes her growth but is also self-aware about her tumultuous history with men. Knowing fulfillment and self-love aren’t a straight line, she’s persistent in undertaking new adventures and continuing building gratitude and self-sufficiency. She doesn’t know she’ll be able to preserve this renewed sense of positivity, but as long as she is “growing in the right direction,” as she puts it, she’ll pull through. As for dating, Selena isn’t actively pursuing a boyfriend at the moment, but she hasn’t shut down shop either. She has a list of criteria that must be met before she jumps into the ordeal and risks another public humiliation. Moreover, now that she has the patience and wisdom that comes with maturity and experience, she’s not settling for anything she deems a bad fit. “I think you know when you get older. You find people that are actually right for you, that are actually on the same wavelength,” she said. Never forget to admire your growth Life is such a quick, maddening journey that many people don’t know how to even recognize or process their growth. You’re growing in so many ways, every single day, every single minute, whether or not it’s come to your attention. Even when you deny it, you’re growing and evolving and maturing and becoming the best version of yourself. If Selena Gomez can make the transition from the exploited, insecure starlet to a self-assured, thriving businesswoman, it’s possible for you as well. But you can’t hope to find joy or success in life unless you take a moment to acknowledge how far you’ve come along and what you’ve been able to do up until this point. There might be a long road ahead, but life’s nothing if you can’t press pause for a second and admire your development. More inspiring stories:Selena Gomez Shares How She Deals With Toxic Lies As She Battles Personal StrugglesHow Hailey Baldwin Dealt With Being In A Love Triangle Involving Selena GomezHow Selena Gomez Purged All Toxicity From Her Life To Become Her Better SelfSelena Gomez Opens Up About the Dangers (and Value) of Social Media

Why We Need To Talk About The Jennifer Lopez vs Jennifer Garner Conversation
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Why We Need To Talk About The Jennifer Lopez vs Jennifer Garner Conversation

When you wage a battle between the two Jennifers, it’s only women that end up on the losing side. Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner are two of the most beloved, accomplished, and charming personalities of our time, with each boasting monumental accolades in film, television, and music. Yet, what unites them is not their triumphant careers or their ubiquitous first name — it’s the man they’ve both been romantically associated with at different points of their lives: Ben Affleck. The comparison between the two Jennifers is unfair and sexistAs the wildly astonishing reunion of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez soars and flourishes before the frenzied paparazzi, a lot of questions have been raised about Jennifer Garner and the role she’s played in her ex-husband’s life over the years, including whether she’s indirectly driven him into the arms of J-Lo. Of course, these questions inevitably lead to baseless comparisons between the two women that not only erase their individuality but also disparage the man at the center of it all. Here’s why the phenomenon needs to be closely examined.As soon as it emerged that Bennifer, the iconic portmanteau referring to the coupledom of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez, had resumed their relationship following a 17-year break, the press went into overdrive. Their initial romance was so widely covered and so obsessively monitored that it essentially epitomized, if not coined, the term ‘power couple.’ To no one’s surprise, the second iteration has been receiving as much, if not more, attention among the public. What’s problematic is when the collective fixation on the pairing also ropes in other individuals that don’t want to be part of the conversation. For example, when J-Lo went Instagram-official with Ben via a PDA-filled photo on her 52nd birthday, a peculiar phrase started trending on the internet. Not ‘Bennifer’ or ‘J-Lo’ or ‘Ben Affleck.’ It was ‘Jennifer Garner vs. Jennifer Lopez.’ All of a sudden, the masses wanted to compare the two women and investigate Ben’s alleged preference for one over the other, as if it was the primary factor that led to the dissolution of Ben and Jennifer Garner’s marriage. The discourse was unnecessary from the get-go and only served to strengthen the tabloid-oriented culture of pitting women against each other. Some publications went so far as to juxtapose photos of Jennifer Garner running around in ordinary clothing with those of J-Lo posing glamorously in her designer bikinis — indicating that there must be an issue with Jennifer Garner’s attractiveness, something so horrific that alienated Ben and triggered the split. Activist and actress Jameela Jamil spoke out about the sheer malice involved in setting these women in opposition to each other. “ This bulls-t comes from patriarchy and is repeatedly infused into our psyche via the mostly but not only tabloid media. Let the Jens live. Let women live. Let girls live. Stop the rot,” she wrote in an Instagram post. It also doesn’t address the complete picture and has no basisThere are a number of concerns with such a compare/contrast mindset. For starters, there’s very little achieved in the way of empowerment if you begin to measure women based on how desirable they appear to the opposite sex. You’re reducing their worth to how a man might perceive them, and if the man in question selects one and ‘rejects’ the other, it must mean there’s a clear winner and that the other woman is as good as useless as far as anyone is concerned. In reality, you can’t determine love and marriage like it’s an athletic race; these women aren’t gold, silver, or bronze medals where one is clearly superior to the other. Determining their value solely on whether they can land a particular man is not sustainable in the least; it means that a women’s ‘worth’ fluctuates with the whims of her lover. If he finds her desirable, she indeed must be beautiful; if he leaves for another woman, well, there is something wrong about her, isn’t it? This sort of framework only breeds hostility among the women, who might find themselves seething with jealousy over being jilted by their partner in favor of another woman. Jealousy leads to judgment, which can incite harmful manifestations of aggression and self-loathing.The Lopez vs. Garner debate is specifically nonsensical because it’s not like Ben Affleck left Jennifer Garner to hook up with J-Lo. He’s dated quite a few women since his separation from Jennifer Garner. He isn’t some naïve dog who couldn’t resist J-Lo’s hotness, choosing to abandon his family to have a go with his ex. Ben is an adult who understands his priorities and has sight of the bigger picture. If he was really going for sexy women, he could have opted for just about anyone in Hollywood. Clearly, there’s something else about J-Lo that draws him to her. Besides, if rumors are anything to go by, Ben’s split from Jennifer Garner is said to have been caused by his relapse into alcoholism and a potential nanny affair, not by J-Lo’s arrival as she’d been dating Alex Rodriguez until April 2021. It also debunks the assumption that Jennifer Garner must be heartbroken at seeing her ex rekindle the passion with his ex. Why are we just presuming Jennifer Garner is pining over him when she’s the one who likely decided to end the marriage? Ben called the split “the biggest regret of [his] life,” so there’s no rhyme or reason to portraying Jennifer Garner as the pathetic sadsack in this scenario. In fact, sources say Jennifer Garner is “supportive” about Bennifer’s reunion, adding that she just wants what’s best for her ex-husband and her family.Let women thrive As Jameela Jamil said about the matter, “let women live.” Don’t stir up controversy where it’s not warranted. Don’t manufacture drama only because it’s entertaining to you, and the chaos seems worthwhile. Most women grow up feeling severely inadequate and insecure, slipping into shame spirals that eat away at their sense of self. They blame themselves for occurrences outside of their control and will develop intense emotions of resentment and anger for women they deem as enemies. It doesn’t mean that women aren’t allowed to hate other women or that they aren’t supposed to have personal or professional rivalries. They can very well take place in your life, and you’ll have to learn how to deal with them without losing your sanity. What’s worse is when it’s not two women fighting but the rest of the world conspiring to create animosity out of thin air. You have to remember that it’s always best to leave women up to their devices and keep these comparisons at bay. They don’t matter, they don’t make sense, and they don’t do justice to the women working hard to preserve their self-esteem and sense of agency. More inspiring stories:What Convinced Jennifer Lopez She Had To Break Things Off With DiddyHow Jennifer Lopez’s Breakup With Alex Rodriguez Exposes Double StandardsBen Affleck’s Accountability Journey Starts With Acknowledging The Women In His PastWhat Jennifer Garner Learned From The Horror Show Of A Divorce From Ben Affleck

Kaley Cuoco Shows Us the Emotional Reality of Finding Love After Divorce
Dating

Kaley Cuoco Shows Us the Emotional Reality of Finding Love After Divorce

In June 2021, Kaley Cuoco celebrated five years of knowing Karl Cook and three years of being married to him by joking on Instagram, “Why have you stayed married to me for so long?! I’m sincerely impressed,” she quipped, adding, “I love you oh so much you have no idea.” Cook responded with his own sweet post, writing, “I am just as amazed it’s been three years, feel like just a flash. I love you so much and I can’t wait for a million more years!!” In fact, it’s no surprise at all that the pair hit the three-year mark, even if Cuoco was convinced she’d never walk down the aisle again after her whirlwind marriage to Ryan Sweeting ended in divorce before they ever celebrated their two-year anniversary. Since then, the actress has spoken candidly about the difficulties of working through the end of a marriage, as well as the importance of coming to terms with it — because everything happens for a reason. Here’s what Kaley Cuoco can teach us about finding love post-divorce:Kaley Cuoco rushed into marriage, but couldn’t rush healing Kaley Cuoco and tennis player Ryan Sweeting had only been dating for three short months when they announced their engagement in September 2013. Sticking to their fast pace, they tied the knot just three months after that, saying “I do” on New Year’s Eve. The actress acknowledged that their speedy timeline wasn’t for everyone, but assured fans that it made sense for her and Sweeting. “I know that it seems a little crazy on paper but it works for us,” she said, adding, “From day one, I just knew immediately and it’s been magic.” Sadly, their whirlwind romance didn’t make it in the long run and, in September 2015, the couple announced that they had “mutually decided to end their marriage” after just 21 months. As the actress told Cosmopolitan in 2016, she wanted her marriage “to work so badly, more than anything, and tried harder than anyone could have tried,” but there were “circumstances I couldn’t get past.” At the time, she didn’t elaborate on what those circumstances were, but in 2018, she told Cosmopolitan that a major reason behind her divorce was that she didn’t fully know her partner. “I married someone the first time who completely changed,” she revealed, explaining, “The person I ended up with was not the person I originally met. And that wasn’t my fault — that was his,” she continued, noting she decided to file for divorce because she knew she deserved more. “I knew how much I had to give and how much I wanted to receive,” she told the outlet. The Big Bang Theory alum also acknowledged to Variety that she and Sweeting didn’t take enough time to learn about each other, quipping, “We got married in, like, six seconds.” Kaley Cuoco and ex husband Ryan Sweeting The person I ended up with was not the person I originally met. And that wasn’t my fault — that was his.Kaley CuocoBut while getting married was fast, recovering from divorce was anything but. Shortly after her split, Cuoco admitted to Cosmopolitan that she initially felt numb and tried to push down her feelings, until she began having panic attacks and crying without warning. That’s when she realized she needed to face her pain head-on, grieve properly, and “really go through this.” As she learned, a breakup “is like losing someone” and can feel like “a loss of hope,” so a proper mourning period is essential. It wasn’t easy, however. Cuoco recalled how sadness would hit her “out of nowhere,” especially when she thought about her life plans crumbling around her. “I thought I’d have a baby by now!” she said. “You see your life going one way, and then it’s the direct opposite way. I’m waking up going, ‘Oh my god, my life just flipped upside down,’” she confessed. But she was determined to work through it and that’s exactly what she did. As “The Flight Attendant” star told the mag, she listened to Adele’s “Hello” 75 times in a row and cried; she deleted Instagram photos of her wedding; she redecorated the house she had shared with her ex; and she dedicated more time to things that made her happy, like riding horses. Basically, anything and everything that would help her heart heal. Kaley Cuoco’s divorce made her question the importance of marriage As Kaley Cuoco worked hard to mend her heart and slowly became open to the idea of loving again, her shattered view of marriage seemed irreparable. “[What happened] changed the way I look at marriage, and that makes me sad,” Kaley Cuoco told Cosmopolitan in 2016, but clarified, “It does not change the way that I look at love. I cannot wait to be in love again,” she enthused. That being said, her split from Ryan Sweeting taught her the importance of taking your time and she wasn’t going to rush into anything. “I don’t feel like I am ready yet. I realized that recently actually, I was like, ‘Oh, I’m not ready,’ which is so different for me,” she told the mag, admitting that was very different from her usual approach to love. “I dive into everything,” she conceded. “I close doors and I’m immediately into the next open door, and this surprised me. My friends and I talk about this a lot, and I said, ‘I’m really not quite ready,’ and they go, ‘We’re glad to hear you say that!’” she shared. [What happened] changed the way I look at marriage, and that makes me sad...it does not change the way I look at love. I cannot wait to be in love again.Kaley CuocoIn taking her time and working through her emotions in an honest way, she also came to terms with her split. Rather than holding onto any regrets, Cuoco told CBS This Morning (via Us Weekly) that she chose to use the divorce as a stepping stone and a learning experience. “You know what, I’m not ashamed of anything that happened,” she began. “I fall in love really hard, I do. I go deep,” she said, noting, “[I] wouldn’t call it a mistake, it just is what happened in my life, so I’m excited to see what the future holds. It happened, and now I have to say I’m happier than I’ve ever been.” As she told The Talk (via People), “It’s like I saw the light somehow.” Kaley Cuoco is now enjoying marriage on her terms Kaley Cuoco may have waited for the right time to put her heart out there once more, but she never doubted that she would one day find the right match for her. As she confessed on The Talk (via People) in 2016, she knew “deep down” that her marriage to Ryan Sweeting was “just not the right thing,” but she was confident that “the right thing is coming for me.” And she was right. In March 2016, Cuoco went Instagram official with professional equestrian Karl Cook whom she met at a horse show. They instantly bonded over their shared “passion for horses and dogs” and, as she told The Talk, it was just what she had been waiting for. “I’m so happy,” she gushed. “I can’t stop smiling. Life is so so good. I finally found my horse guy!” she joked, adding, “It was very meant to be” and calling Cook “a great human.”The Emmy nominee shared a similar sentiment with Us Weekly in 2017, telling the outlet, “I feel very, very lucky that I found someone like him.” Asked why they’re such a good match, she joked, “I like to torture him and he doesn’t get mad at me. He just let’s me do it!” But there’s more to their bond than him having “such a great sense of humor.” As Cuoco gushed, Cook is “a real person and I think the big deal was knowing how much he loves dogs and horses — that’s always on my checklist. ‘Must love dogs’ is number one and he checked that off quite quickly and I fell very hard.”So hard that she even changed her stance about marriage. As she told Cosmopolitan in 2018, “I honestly thought I wouldn’t get married again. My ex ruined that word for me,” but then Cook came along. They tied the knot in June 2018 after nearly two years of dating and in August 2019, Cuoco revealed how they were doing marriage on their terms. “We have a very unconventional marriage,” she shared, admitting they still weren’t living together. “We’re not together every single day and I think, personally, it’s important, it works well for us,” she explained, adding, “It just makes life really fun.” She also enthused about their setup on The View, saying (via Architectural Digest), “It’s been working great and we love it. We love it, so I don’t know why people have such an issue.” In the end, it was the pandemic that forced them to finally move in under one roof and, luckily, “it's been great for our relationship,” Cuoco told Jimmy Kimmel, joking, “And we like each other, we realized, which is even better.” Just don’t expect them to permanently change their setup. “We do both travel a lot, which I think is very healthy,” she told Us Weekly, adding, “Our time at home is minimal, which makes us super appreciate it.” Kaley Cuoco can teach us all an important lesson about breakups: healing is key. Rather than pushing aside your emotions, you need to face them head-on and, as hard as it may be at the beginning, use them as a learning experience. The actress shows us that it’s imperative to embrace both life’s ups and downs because you can’t have one without the other. As she herself realized, everything she went through in her first marriage was worthwhile because, in the end, “it brought me to Karl.”More inspiring stories:Friendship Goals: Kaley Cuoco and Johnny Galecki Bonded After Their BreakupEminem Reveals The Real Reason Why He’s Still Single After DivorceWhy We Need To Talk About Kelly Clarkson’s Shocking Divorce SettlementWhy Scarlett Johansson Refuses To Open Up About Her Divorce From Ryan Reynolds

Three Women Discover They're Dating The Same Man - What Happens Next Is Shocking
Uplifting News

Three Women Discover They're Dating The Same Man - What Happens Next Is Shocking

In the film "The Other Woman," Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann and Kate Upton joined forces after dumping the same man that deceived them. In an example of life imitating art, three snakebitten women ditched one cheating slimeball to embark on a made-for-movie adventure. Triple-crossedMorgan Tabor sensed that something wasn't right with her boyfriend.The 21-year-old resident of Boise, Idaho thought they were exclusive. Well, that was until finding flirty texts from several women on his social media.Taking a closer look at the women's pages shocked her, she told the Washington Post."Almost all of the photos on this girl’s page showed her with this guy who I’d thought was my boyfriend."- Morgan TaborTabor then decided to reach out to two of the women, Abi Roberts and Bekah King. Unsurprisingly, they too thought they were exclusively dating the same guy.Roberts couldn't believe it.“This guy had literally slept at my house the night before, kissed me goodbye and said he was driving back to Boise [from Utah] to visit his family,” she said.BustedInstead of visiting family, he instead showed up at Tabors house -- all while she was FaceTiming her new friend, Abi Roberts.Busted.“We were talking, and I suddenly heard his car outside and he came to the door with flowers,” Tabor said.“Hey, look here,” she recalled telling him. “I’ve made some new friends.”Tabor said that “Watching his face drop when he saw who I was talking to on FaceTime was the most cinematic moment ever.”After hearing his pathetic pleas for another chance, the girls dumped him.A new adventureAlthough in different states, the women became fast friends. They coped with the heartbreak by texting and FaceTiming each other over several months. Finally, the three decided to meet at Roberts' apartment. They immediately bonded like besties.“We did a lot of trauma processing and memory sharing, and it was obvious that we were all really cool, fun people who had a lot in common,” Roberts said. “Right away, we became good friends.”Ironically, it was through sharing stories about their cheating ex that the girls stumbled on how they could leave his memory in the dust, together.“This guy had told each of us that it was his dream to pick up a VW bus and travel around the country in it,” she said. "We were sitting around laughing and talking about the van life that weekend, and pretty soon we thought, ‘Hey, we can do this.’"- Abi RobertsAnd so, pooling their money together, the three girls bought an old bus and got to work. With the help of relatives and Youtube videos, they got together every week to work on it. Finally, their road warrior was complete.The completed restored bus looked like something out of an A&E show reno show, with crisp paint, new flooring and furniture.With their bus packed, they're embarking through the rocky west with the goal of ending up in sunny California. The journey always beats the destinationAnd so, their amazing journey continues. Their Instagram page, The BAM Bus (For each of their initials) captures their exploits and counts over 65,000 followers. For Roberts and her friends, it's not about the past but the amazing present. "What this guy did to us doesn’t define our lives. We all feel really blessed that we found each other. We’re friends for life."- Abi RobertsYou could understand if the women combined their anger to publicly shame their ex and rile up the social media mob. They could have made their story about their past.But they didn't.Instead, they ditched their cheating boyfriend and focused on their newfound friendships and possibilities. In doing so, they give everyone a new playbook on how to bounce back from heartache. No matter what happens to you, it's never too late to reinvent yourself or reshape your future as you want it. More uplifting storiesThe Weeknd Never Forgot The Friends Who Were There When He Was HomelessPerceptive Bartender Saves Women From Creep Who Won’t Take No For An AnswerStudent Raises $28,600 For Homeless Man Who Offered To Pay Her Taxi HomeMillionaire Shocks Neighbors By Inviting Homeless Couple To Live In His $4M House

Eminem Reveals The Real Reason Why He's Still Single After Divorce
Dating

Eminem Reveals The Real Reason Why He's Still Single After Divorce

Who would want to take relationship advice from Eminem?The rapper has a history of bad behavior and poor decision-making, not to mention emotional and physical abuse, so you’d be forgiven for disregarding his opinions on modern romance and human connection. With that being said, it’s also crucial to acknowledge the measures he’s undertaken over the years to acknowledge his wrongdoings and make amends with the people he’s hurt. His ex-wife Kimberly Anne Scott suffered plenty, having been explicitly referenced in the majority of Eminem’s tunes, which generally lean on the side of crass and insensitive. Yet, outside of this one high school sweetheart, Eminem hasn’t been romantically involved with anyone in a long time — at least not to the public’s knowledge. As a matter of act, his domestic affairs are completely surrounded by a shroud of secrecy, and unless he deliberately chooses to clue us in through a musical verse, we’ll remain none the wiser. The man has mastered the art of tactfully separating his public and private identities, but on the rare occasion that he does open up, there’s value in taking note of his perspective and seeing how it can apply in our own lives. Eminem shares his views on dating and why it's not for him at the momentIn an interview with Vulture, Eminem reveals the pitfalls of dating post-divorce and why it’s particularly challenging to pursue love with his level of celebrity. Not only does he have to convince every woman he is a changed man, but he also has to ensure the public doesn’t catch wind of the potential romance. He’s in his late forties, notoriously aggressive, has a tumultuous past that you can’t really justify, and is routinely feuding with many of his peers in the hip-hop space, sometimes all at once. There’s a lot you would have to overcome if you want to give Eminem a shot, and so there’s an added layer of hardship on his end to navigating this convoluted, ever-fluctuating social scene. Since my divorce I’ve had a few dates and nothing’s panned out in a way that I wanted to make it public [...] Dating’s just not where I’m at lately.Eminem to VultureEminem shared he’s tried his hand at meeting women and establishing an intimate connection with them, but nothing’s worked out in his favor. As a result, it’s impacted his desire to put himself out there in the first place, and he doesn’t think it’s worthwhile at this point to dedicate his energy to these endeavors. He downloaded Tinder, gone to strip clubs, took part in setups, but if it’s not meant to be, it’s not meant to be. “It was an interesting time for me,” he said. When asked if he feels lonely, he laughs off the question and says, “Am I lonely? No, I’m good. Thanks for asking though.”Eminem’s plight is relatable in that it’s all too easy to get discouraged by dating prospects. We’ve all been here: if you have a couple of bad encounters, you might be inclined to revert to your comfort zone immediately. It becomes more of an uphill battle as you get older: your patience wears thin, you’re not looking to experiment as much, and you just want someone to understand you and where you’re coming from. You expect a certain level of maturity from the other person, and if they can’t deliver a precise configuration of kindness, love, and respect, why even bother?He reveals the real reason why he prefers to remain singleThere’s something to be said about a man who is able to maintain such a high standard of privacy in this day and age. Yes, he’s said and done some truly horrendous things, some that don’t inspire the slightest bit of confidence in his ability to be a good partner, but he’s also at a different phase of his life, a critical juncture that could make or break his legacy. Even his most zealous supporters wonder why Marshall Mathers is so secretive about his romantic side. Surely, it exists, so why has he been so resistant about disclosing any information to the public, especially if it could subvert expectations and portray him in a more sympathetic light? There has been longstanding speculation about his sexuality or lack thereof, whereas others assume he’s still pining for Kim. Eminem says it’s because he has deep-rooted trust issues and therefore isn’t fond of placing confidence in someone who could potentially hurt him or exploit his influence. He has a hard time distinguishing those whose motives are nefarious and those who are genuinely well-intentioned. He doesn’t want to give his everything to a woman, only to have her take advantage of his vulnerability and make off with a portion of his wealth. I have trust issues. With women, friends, whatever. You always wonder what their real motives are. Eminem to Rolling StoneBesides, it’s too much of a gamble to take the woman out in public and attract a horde of paparazzi, capturing every moment of the date. “Going out in public is too crazy,” shared the father-of-three. We, as ordinary people, take these experiences for granted: going out to see the movies, dining out at a fancy restaurant, going to the amusement park. We’re able to soak up the moment without feeling threatened by scrutiny or judgment. When you’re Eminem, however, you have to be careful about each and every move. Despite his misgivings about dating post-divorce, he hasn’t totally given up on the idea of finding the special person. “I mean, I'd like to be in a relationship again someday. Who doesn't? It's just hard to meet new people, in my position,” he told Rolling Stone. But he has to account for the numerous traps laid out in his path. If your heart is not in it and if you don’t think it’s worth your time, what more can you do? Yet, the beautiful thing about growing older is becoming attuned to your own preferences and desires, so you’ll have an easier time identifying the bad apples. Also, it’s about longevity at this point, so you’re less focused on the vain, material pleasures that might have dominated your youth and more concerned about the quality and the integrity of the person you’re seeing. Don’t push yourself for something unless you’re readyEminem’s familiar case reminds us it’s never worth it to push yourself towards a new chapter unless you’re well and truly ready for the change. Yes, it’s never too late to undertake new responsibilities and discover new adventures, but you also have to be in the right mindset. Dating will seem impossibly strenuous at times, and you’ll likely consider quitting the whole song and dance. Yet, instead of shutting the door on romance for good, you can just press pause and take a step back. Gain a fresh perspective, prioritize other areas of your life, and come back to the same point when you’re ready. As mentioned, it’s never too late, so you shouldn’t worry about some imaginary clock. More inspiring stories:Why We Need To Talk About Eminem Getting “Canceled” on TikTokWhy Eminem’s Long-Awaited Apology To Rihanna About Her Assault Still MattersThe Story Behind Eminem’s Two Adoptive Daughters Will Change How You See HimEminem’s Daughter Is Nothing Like Him–And He Couldn’t Be More Proud