Close Ad

The 3 Best Ways to Get Over A Breakup, According To Science
Woman looking at crashing waves
Heartbreak

The 3 Best Ways to Get Over A Breakup, According To Science

As the old song goes, breaking up is hard to do. But we all have gone through it, and most of us have managed to come out on the other side, eventually.

woman-looking-crashing-waves

Being in love is basically an addiction, if you look at the brain chemistry and bodily physiology involved. "The dopamine pathways involved in love are similar to those in cocaine addiction. Because of that, breaking up is like going through drug withdrawal," says David Bennett, a certified counselor, relationship expert, and co-author of seven self-help books.


So since there is a scientific reason behind the heart-wrenching pain we feel, here are the best ways to get over a breakup, according to the experts.

1. Self-care

It's important to take really good care of yourself after a breakup. "Become your own best friend and treat yourself with love and compassion. Feelings like sadness, anger and even depression are normal after a breakup," says Antonia Hall, MA., a psychologist, relationship expert and sexpert and author of The Ultimate Guide to a Multi-Orgasmic Life.

Studies also indicate that sleep issues can occur. "It's good to give yourself time to grieve the loss of the relationship in healthy ways, like crying, beating up pillows and journaling your feelings," says Hall.

2. Connect with other people on a chemical level

As humans, we have a biological need to connect. "The science suggests that a disruption of connection, including the breakup of a romantic relationship, causes real pain," says Jordan Pickell, MCP RCC, a registered clinical counselor. Because of this, recovering from a breakup necessarily includes coming back into attuned connection with another person, whether with a new romantic partner or with a friend or therapist.
There are multiple ways to ease the pain of a break up, but one is to find others who may stimulate the same brain chemistry. "This is why rebounding is likely so common," says Bennett. "It's people recovering from the pain of a break up seeking a neurochemical 'hit' similar to what the partner they broke up with gave them," says Bennett. Sex and a connection with a new person right away are attempts to experience the same brain chemistry involved with their ex. However, this doesn't always succeed.

3. Let time work its magic

Another way to get over a breakup is to simply let time pass. "This gives the body's physiology a chance to return to normal, and readjust from the rise and fall that came (and went) from the infatuation and break up," says Bennett.
After time has passed, and the body has returned to normal, it's much easier to see your ex in a more realistic light, as the addiction has likely faded to at least some degree. However, for some people, the addicting nature of the feeling of being in love doesn't subside much with time.
Do things that make you feel better and elevate your mood. "Exercise is great because it increases production of feel good chemicals while reducing stress hormones," says Hall. "Eat right, and avoid overuse of alcohol, which can lead to even greater feelings of depression," says Hall.
Know that breakups usually happen for good reasons, and if your needs weren't being met in the relationship, you deserve better."Now is the time to call upon your support people, rather than isolating yourself," says Hall.
If you don't feel like that's enough, seek help from a certified counselor.
Vjtbp 5ivtf2vbhdn1v kdkwwusxv7qo9ywmtuaocq58uittxbf5myp5uspnqnmjkqimtgoyuecqhhxmmt9i0sfrzbvmlfox0gyoyfphbkytikx876vduzvyxlegerw wyc2skjq6hh 99fgzfqjeldv5pbovyduk71pfohizh9kmuiiler4zrgmu7rtk7ioqaqwc1xrs5mdgt0pkg=s0 d e1 ft

Hot Stories

Leonardo DiCaprio Told Kate Winslet To “Let The Fat Girl Thing Go”
Leo Dicaprio Told Kate Winslet To “Let The Fat Girl Thing Go” …

Forced to feel ashamed for her weight and appearance, Kate Winslet struggled with her body image for years. The media loved to tease her for being “the fat girl,” but there was ONE PERSON who saw the real her. What did Leo see in Kate? And what important message does Kate have for young women everywhere?


Keep ReadingShow less
Videos
Woman at a restaurant's window and two teen employees.

Teens Applauded For the Way They Handled This Angry Customer

Instagram/ @kekessnowballs

Working in customer service can be challenging, especially when you’re dealing with rude and demanding clients. That’s particularly true for some teens, who work these jobs for part-time money and are often bullied by adults. Perhaps that’s why people are applauding these teen girls for the way they expertly handled an over-the-top customer.

Keep ReadingShow less
Uplifting News
Man standing with two daughters, a black purse and a handwritten note (inset)

Grieving Daughter Finds Note In Fossil Purse While Thrifting

Courtesy Anna Harp and Courtesy of Abrielle Clausing (via People.com)

Thrifting can net all sorts of treasures. Shoppers can snatch up everything from vintage clothes to mid-century modern furniture to kitschy knick-knacks, all without breaking the bank.

But for one grieving woman, she found a hidden gem that was truly priceless.

Keep ReadingShow less
Uplifting News